Ten Actions That Would Improve The Male Species

1. Learn how to apologise without having to be practically forced to kicking and screaming. Seriously, how is it possible that one little word, ‘Sorry’ can be so difficult to say. They can say ‘sex’, ’blowjob’, ‘dinner’ and ‘threesome’ with no trouble, but they just can’t cay ‘Sorry’.

2. Learn how to apologise, understand why and mean it. Saying sorry because their nuts are turning blue from being ignored by us, or because they just want things to go back to normal is not enough. Guys need to think outside the box a little (Be careful that their heads don’t explode) and look at things from someone else’s perspective for a change. And just think, if they understood why they were apologising, they’d learn how to stop repeating the same mistakes.
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Friday Humour:10 Things That Will Scare Away a Guy

If you ever want to scare a date away, these are the things that should have him running for the hills.
1. Turn up to a date with your overnight ‘suitcase’ with enough stuff to last you a month.
2. Don’t bother with the trying to impress him. Have the hair all jacked up and a tracksuit that’s seen better days.
3. Tell him that you know that you’ve only heavy petted but you’re CONVINCED you’re pregnant and that he’d better step up to his responsibilities.

4. Tell him you’re a chick with a dick.
5. Refuse to go on dates alone and bring a friend, or even worse, your mum or dad.
6. Answer the door in a wedding dress.
7. Get a big beefy guy to turn up when you’re on the date and say that he’s your boyfriend.
8. Talk about your ex all night and keep bursting into tears.
9. Take out your lipstick and after putting it on your lips, make slashing marks at your face like a mad woman with the lipstick.
10. Hand him all of your household bills and tell him that as your date, you expect them all to be paid within 24 hours.

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Friday Humour: Forgive Me Father

Forgive me father, for I have sinned. It has been several weeks since my last confession. Actually, I’m not even Catholic anymore, but I still need to confess my sins. I broke a commandment. “Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s wife.” Now, technically this isn’t the commandment I broke. It’s more like an adapted version. “Thou shalt not covet the husband of a person you don’t know.” Now, before anyone calls me a home wrecker or a floozy, I need to point out that I would never act on this attraction, but I have it. Boy do I have it. And I had it long before I knew he was taken. And I will in all likelihood continue to have it. He’s just so pretty in a scruffy, half-homeless kind of way that we know turns my head. And if he were any sweeter he’d have to be made out of pixie stick powder. And I’m coveting him. And I’m feeling a bit guilty. And now I feel better.

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Gold-diggers R Us

The term gold digger has been generalized to include any woman that although she is an independant diva in her own right, expects traditional dating roles to apply. This is my anthem to the contrary.

Just because I want a man that has his life in order, that has dreams and aspirations, that has a J-O-B, that has things going for him, does not make me a golddigger.

Just because the guys I date must have their own means of transportation, no longer live
with their parents and know what hard work means does not make me a golddigger.

Just because when I go out with a guy I expect gentlemanly conduct at all times, like doors opened for me, and allow him to pick up the cheque does not make me a golddigger.

Just because I don’t date guys that have no jobs or disposable income does not make me a golddigger.

Just because I receive gifts graciously, and accept flowers and candy and presents with a smile and a heartfelt thank you does not make me a golddigger.

Just because I allowed you to take me on a shopping spree while we bought items and accessories of my choice does not make me a golddigger. It just makes me a spoiled princess that knows what she wants. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

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Grrrrrrrrr!!! Telemarketers Suck!

To the telemarketers that call at all times of the day and night, irrespective to the fact that I’m on the National Do Not Call List. This is to you!

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