Hence when they don’t put out or hound you for sex, we tend to feel a tad confused and wonder what is wrong with us. But…and it kills me to say it….not every guy wants to shag your brains out all the time…. If by some sheer chance his behaviour is a result of avoiding sex, this situation isn’t going to resolve itself and if he wants to be in this relationship and make you feel loved, cherished, and valued, he needs to be in it and he needs to be making every effort to positively improve your relationship and if that means going to a sex counsellor, so be it.

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In the past I’ve had a lot of emails from women where they tell me the most awful things about their relationship with a guy and they finish it off by saying how they love him and the sex is amazing and yada, yada, and it’s what I’ve previously referred to as Great Dysfunctional Sex - sex powered by lots of negativity normally created by drama and insecurity…. Bad relationships that are full of drama, emotional unavailability and anything else that happens to be counter productive to a successful relationship are devaluing, degrading, and have a nasty habit of reducing our self-esteem so that we end up feeling like non-entities and even more dependent on the poor relationship because how we perceive ourselves becomes intrinsically tied to how successful or unsuccessful our relationships are.

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A few days ago I wrote about The Justifying Zone, that slippery slope that women can find themselves on when they stick with a guy so that they can justify their emotional or sexual investment, even if they recognise that that the relationship is doomed. A couple of male commenters raised the point that sometimes [...]

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The Justifying Zone is that slippery slope that a lot of women find themselves in, especially after they have sexual contact with a guy. Many of us feel that we need to justify our emotional and sexual investment and this justification is effectively attempting to close the door after the horse has bolted.
The Justifying Zone [...]

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“I met a man who is the cousin of a good friend in June of 2007 and have been on an emotional rollercoaster ever since. I have totally fallen for him to the point of obsessing.
In the beginning, he was so attentive and sweet; shortly after the relationship became sexual, he changed, although he [...]

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Over at Advice from a Single Dating Expert, Evan tackles the age-old issue of when it’s the right time to have sex, and surmises this grey area very well.
“As a woman, your job is not to come up with an arbitrary number of dates, like the U.S. coming up with a pull out date for [...]

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A new study by The University of Texas School of Public Health suggests that women who meet with men that they met online are a lot friskier for bare-back sex… Whilst the study found that women are extra cautious about meeting face-to-face with men from dating sites, it seems that once they have met [...]

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I’m 35 and have not had a sexual relationship for 6 years. Prior to that I had only had a few sexual partners, though one in my early twenties had been my partner of 3 years. In my mid twenties I explored my sexuality and had relationships with women. Since my late twenties [...]

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“It’s hard to have casual sex without getting emotionally involved,”
Normally I would attribute these words to a woman, but on this occasion, it is to Ben, someone who claims to be amongst a growing number of men who just aren’t into booty calls. Say what?
“He’s Just Not That Into It” in Details Magazine examines this [...]

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Recently I’ve been asked by several readers whether a booty call can become so much more. I must say firstly though, if you know that you’re actually a booty call, should you really be asking this question! Anyway…
Booty Call: This is when someone has the ability to flex their dialing finger and call up a [...]

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