Vixen’s Guide to: Getting Your Man to Talk Dirty
June 7, 2006 by Vixen · 4 Comments
Talking dirty comprises of all the really no-holds-barred comments you make in the boudoir. The ones that might give you a blush in polite society and yet is deemed acceptable in the bedroom. The ones that you come with a request, a demand, an invitation. The arena of dirty talk, where four letter words are just the precursors to more passion and ardor.
In my limited experience, I’ve come across a couple of guys who are really shy when it comes to breaking out the nasty words in the bedroom. I’m all for a guy being a gentleman outside of the bedroom but how am I supposed to unleash my inner vixen if you shudder and shrink at the words coming out of my mouth? How am I supposed to let myself go there, let loose and let it all out when I have to restrain myself in the guise of being polite? Who stays polite in the bedroom anyway? Virgin Mary?
“Such a potty mouth you have there,” one unfortunate guy actually had the audacity to tell me. Please don’t ask me what happened to him—needless to say it wasn’t pretty.
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Vixen’s Guide to: Catering to Your Man When You are Too Tired for Sex
April 19, 2006 by Vixen · 2 Comments
Sometimes, even the most highly sexual and passionate relationship can head for Slumpville. Either one or both of you is really not into the encounter, or you are sticking to the same monotonous routine that turns sex into a mundane activity that is inane and humdrum instead of thrilling and exciting.
First of all, you have to recognise that you are in the doldrums. Sure, we’re not expecting you to screw like rabbits 24/7 for the rest of your lives but if you haven’t gotten some decent action in a week or two (or more!), then consider this a wake up call. The excuse of having a headache or being too tired might work for a few times but eventually your significant other will start getting turned off and upset by your rejection.
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Vixen’s Guide to: Public Displays of Affection.
April 6, 2006 by NML · Leave a Comment
Spring is in the air and with it the young lovers of the day emerge from their winter hibernation and come out to play. There are couples everywhere, that sometimes it’s so sickly sweet. There is a fine line between public displays of affection and public displays of lewd acts. Here are my rules that I feel most two-somes should adhere to in order to keep walking the line between cute and nauseating.
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A Guide to Handjobs
Unlike it’s often owner, penises are a sensitive little (or big) things in more ways than one, and they do require a certain way of handling. Here are a few tips to ensure that his penis stays intact and that he’s loving your technique rather than wincing.
Get into a comfortable position and use your writing hand. Have them lie down on their back and you can lay on your side or if sitting up is your thing, have him sit down whilst you either straddle him and do it, or kneel in front and do it. Basically work with what makes you both comfortable.
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How To Have a Booty Call Arrangement
February 22, 2006 by Vixen · 2 Comments
Don’t get caught short by not understanding the rules of the booty call road.
A booty call is a casual arrangement that you have with someone that allows you to flex your dialling finger and say ‘Let’s meet up’ which is code for ‘Come round and do me. NOW’ At some point you both had sex, discovered that it was great, but that’s about all there is to it. Ideally, the person shouldn’t be an ex, as there is history, although if you’re both totally over it, what the hell, go for it.
- Under no circumstances should you have any feelings other than the ones that ripple through your body when you’re having sex with them.
- It’s not making love, it’s good hard sex. Don’t get this mixed up. Making love is for people that actually want to talk to you about non sex related stuff and actually have a relationship.
- If your booty call is less than satisfactory, bin them off. Why go to the trouble of a booty call if you don’t get to come?
- Minimal chit-chat – This is not a relationship. You don’t get to have emotional discussions. Phone your mum or something.
- This is an ad-hoc arrangement. You don’t plan a booty call a few days in advance. They call or you call and you’re either free or not free. Plans are for people in relationships.
- As a general rule of thumb, you get laid and get the hell out. You shouldn’t need to stay over, unless of course you both get on pretty well and you want it again in the morning.
- You don’t meet up with your booty call for lunch or for other recreational activities. Any meeting up such as dinner or drinks should be focused on getting your clothes off.
- Phonecalls should be late. Friends and family call early, booty calls give you a call after 9/10pm.
- Don’t leave anything at their place as that’s couple territory.
- Don’t ask about who they’ve been doing, because you don’t need to know. If you’re talking when you should be going at it, something has gone very wrong.
- No snuggling and spooning each other to sleep. Get up and go home!
- No questions about performance or how you compare to a previous lover. Who cares? It’s sex!
- You don’t need to worry about whether it’s good for them. This is the one time when you can be totally focused on your pleasure. If they’re of the same mind, it should be pretty mind-blowing anyway.
- Don’t go falling in love with your booty call. If a relationship didn’t follow from all that shagging before, it’s unlikely to appear now. Get out if feelings develop.
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Vixen’s Thoughts on: Back Door Entry
February 22, 2006 by Vixen · 13 Comments
It’s happened to most of us, you get in a good sexual groove with a guy, and then out of the blue, he presents you with the all time most annoying sexual request. You cringe, knowing what was to come, and yet knowing that he would ask you anyway. “Can we try anal sex?”
Why in the world do guys like anal sex so much and what’s a girl gonna do when presented with this option?
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Hot Sex: Giving and Taking in the Bedroom
Compromise is a term that is important to every relationship aspect. In the bedroom, compromise plays a prominent role
in overall satisfaction in the boudoir. I’m sure that you may have heard or had a few encounters with selfish lovers, the guys whoexpected you to please them and then fell asleep or left before even trying to do anything that you might like. Hopefully, you never had sex with them again and learned from such encounters.
Sexual liaisons should be all about give and take, a fair-minded approach that lets both of you enjoy the full delights of the bedroom. He should be the pleaser and the pleasured and likewise for you. If you find that you are constantly pleasing him and he rarely pleasures you, then there is something wrong with the picture.
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Vixen’s Guide to: Masturbation, the Art of Self-Loving
February 10, 2006 by Vixen · Leave a Comment
There is a poll on www.Naughtypoll.com that shows that only about 18% of women don’t masturbate. This means that for the other 82% of us that do, masturbation is a pivotal and integral part of our sexual makeup.
Masturbation in centuries past used to be considered a taboo and a sin, but with enlightenment came acceptance of the different parts and facets of sexual makeup. Now I’m not going to expostulate on reasons why you should masturbate, but I do have to say that if you haven’t, you are seriously missing out.
I used to be from the school of thought that masturbation was a big sin and you would ruin sex by doing it. It wasn’t until I had my first proper self loving session did I even ever have a real orgasm. Apparently, what I thought was me orgasming were actually just the pre-tremors. I wouldn’t have known that if I hadn’t engaged in some self loving. The same way that I wouldn’t have known that I was multi-orgasmic, or that you could have orgasms one right on top of another.
For starters, no one can know your body as well as you do. You have had it, looked at it, cared for it for the past few decades and will do so until you are old and infirm. So why not enjoy it?
You might state that you are getting regular sex and masturbation robs your man of pleasure…ummm, okay, totally not true. Masturbating will actually enhance your loveplay because you will know what you like and how to achieve pleasure. And who says you can’t masturbate and still have sex every day? That is just a myth. Guys actually like it when you touch yourself in front of them; it excites them for some reason. So there is no way that you can go wrong with this.
Moving right along, here is my guide to masturbating like a pro.
1. Get Knowledge: Before you even begin to masturbate, you should acquire some ideas to get you started. The internet provides a plethora of ideas and techniques, so do a discreet search to get your mind going. Read some erotic stories, visit sites that sell toys of all shapes and sizes, ogle pictures of really hot men…anything to get your mind going.
2. Acquire Tools: Some ladies prefer their fingers over anything else. Some like the organic use of a vegetable. Others will go for mechanical, battery operated, electric or manual sex toys. Some have discovered the utterly decadent wonders of the Rabbit, the Silver Bullet and Hand blown Glass. Most of the ladies I’ve talked to have more than one toy, so don’t limit yourself. The sex toy industry is booming, and they have all kinds of ideas for every single passion. Indulge yourself and buy whatever you wish, considering it a necessary facet of good self care. If you are shy, order off the internet and have it discretely sent to your mailbox in an undisclosed package. Just bear in mind that all sex toys are Non Returnable barring manufacturing faults, so once you purchase it, you can’t take it back. Don’t forget to stock up on batteries as well!
3. Set the Mood: This has got to be one of the most important things. For some, candles and soft music get them all ready, while others need loud rock music to drown out the sound of the vibrator. Whatever is your mood, have everything to need nearby so you don’t have to interrupt your play. Have some sanitary wipes, some lubrication, and anything else you might need. Disconnect your phone, lock your door, wear some nice lingerie, do what you need to provide for your privacy and enjoyment.
4. Use Your Imagination: Because there is a lack of the physical presence of a guy, you have to send your imagination in overdrive sometimes to be able to get off. Think of the scrumptiously delectable male specimen you were ogling just that morning, and all the naughty things you would like to do to him. Read an erotic XXX story or a watch a video before you start just to get your juices flowing.
5. Get the Party Started: Seriously, I highly doubt I need to expand on this one. Just play around with yourself until you find what you like. Keep doing what works for you. The more you practice, the quicker you can get off. Some like to draw out the pleasure, and can masturbate for 30 minutes to an hour. You might even get so adept that you can become multi-orgasmic, or achieve an orgasm faster than you can say Rumplestiltskin. How cool is that?
Those are the basics ladies. The rest is up to you. Happy loving.
Vixen is Deputy Editor for Baggage Reclaim. Visit her blog Bad Girls Guide
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Vixen’s Guide to: Afterplay
January 26, 2006 by Vixen · Leave a Comment
Afterplay is an essential element in sexual encounters but, more often than not, tends to be overlooked by the male species. A well versed male knows that afterplay is crucial, and has been known to elevate your status from a “he was ok” to a “he was pretty good.”
You falling asleep right after the encounter does not count as afterplay. Neither does a pat on the back and a quick kiss as you rummage on your nightstand to find the remote control or cigarettes.
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Vixen’s Guide to: Going Down On a Woman
I’ve spoken to a few guys that have reported that women don’t like receiving oral sex. Ummm, yeah okay…whatever. She probably told you this because you totally sucked at it and the pain wasn’t worth the hassle. The reason that we say we don’t like receiving oral from guys is that most of you don’t know what the hell you are doing when you go down there and end up just irritating and frustrating us more than anything else.
In my experience, only about 20% of guys know how to go downtown properly and that is a gross exaggeration. Some guys just make up excuses and don’t even attempt it,
so bear in mind that you can’t get an F for trying. Cunnilingus is definitely an art that you need practice and education to master. But it can be mastered.
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