Get Out Of Stuck Guide by Nat Lue


Updated June 12th 2014

I originally created this page and the guide back in September 2010 and have updated this page to reflect a few changes.

Get Out Of Stuck is my guide to getting out of relationship insanity – carrying the same beliefs, baggage, attitudes and choosing same person different package, and then expecting different results. I want to help you transform your beliefs so that you can quit the disappointment cycle.

I’ve been on quite a journey since I first started this blog when I myself was uncovering and even unravelling my own beliefs and experiencing major epiphanies about my love habits and interactions. I really didn’t like myself that much and I was desperate to be loved but at the same time, I was also terrified of being ‘yound out’ – that they’d discover my flaws, which of course my perception of these was based on my beliefs. I had a lot of stuff rattling around in my head but truth be told, when I stopped believing even just one of those beliefs, it automatically called the others into question.

I want you to tackle your beliefs and call yours into question too.

Originally created as an ebook guide, Get Out Of Stuck has been downloaded many thousands of times and has been through a recent update and turned into a 21-day email series.


Please note: Your email address is not shared with any 3rd parties. To find out about other resources that are available to download or sign up for, please check out the Baggage Reclaim downloads area.


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30 Responses to Download Get Out Of Stuck: A guide to transforming your beliefs

  1. Ramona says:

    Thank you NML

  2. Eathan says:

    Happy 5th Birthday and many more :)

  3. Astelle says:

    Natalie, I have been around for a while but I still would like to get a copy, I really don’t feel stuck anymore, but I have one belief that I can’t seem to get rid off: a single men in his mid fourty, not married, will have issues that I don’t want to repeat anymore. Does that make sense?
    Happy 5th Birthday!

  4. Cathy J says:

    Get Out of Stuck – love the concept – have already signed up and keen to read more.

    Five years… congratulations!

    I am really looking forward to your upcoming INTERVIEW this week on Smart Lady Dating and finding out more about these last five years!

  5. meshel says:

    i cant wait, i love the empowering information that natalie gives.

  6. MaryC says:

    Happy 5th Nat, you saved my sanity and even though my journey is long from over I feel soooo much better since I found your site. For me there is light at the end of the very dark tunnel I was in, without you and all the great ladies on this site I don’t know what I would of done. In those dark hours I read everything you had and cried alot but it has helped and knowing I wasn’t the only one is the best therapy. Thank You

  7. Elle says:

    Happy Birthday, BR! Thanks, Natalie. What you do is tremendously good – in every sense.

  8. avril says:

    Mary C you could have been me saying what you said. Natalie, I just wanted to say from the bottom of my heart, you are AWESOME. I don’t believe I’d have made it to one year no contact with out you! It still isn’t easy, but now I realize it’s the loneliness speaking—–not really that I want to fall back into a depressing situation that I had with my MAC
    Happy Birthday NML! and many more!

  9. jenny says:

    Happy Anniversary! I only discovered your site a couple months ago but have found it to be really helpful. It helped me out of my funk and has given me support to get out of a mess, and stay out. Although I have been NC for almost 3 months, I still have nightmares about the AC and would like to just leave him behind for good. I’d love to receive your Get out of Stuck guide! Thank You!!!!!!!

  10. Trinity says:

    Happy 5th Nat :) I can’t wait to read the book :)

  11. Freeatlast says:

    Happy 5th Birthday Baggage Reclaim.

    You have helped me shake off the AC, got me through the NC and the NC reminders were a good wake up call recently as he has been showing up and texting to test the water. It can bring up mixed feelings and cause some confusion so reading your emails put me back on track.

    I have more boundaries and it is causing interesting reactions from some people. I have days when I feel energised and happy but I still haven’t met anyone and can’t help feeling ‘stuck’ at times.

    I really think you should win the Cosmo Awards. The more women who get to know about Baggage Reclaim the better.

  12. Carm says:

    Happy 5th! Found you a little over 2 years ago and have been following since.. my life and outlook has changed drastically since then, thanks in a big part to reading your website!

    • Fearless says:

      Happy Birthday!
      If I’d come across Baggage Reclaim five years ago (or any time in between) I could have saved myself a lot of worry, confusion and misery. I need to wonder, though, for myself, why wasn’t I looking for it (better late than never)…

      the info/advice such as is to be found on this site really should be ‘out there’ – people, particularly young people (perhaps particularly girls), need to be better educated about the pitfalls of ‘relationships’ and how to spot the Assclown/EU. This information should go out to schools! Perhaps if people were more aware, the EU/assclown would have fewer opportunities to run riot over other people’s emotions.

      Thanks, NML, for your straight talking sensible and realistic advice.

  13. Cathy J says:

    I have signed up and confirmed the link however I don’t have the book yet.

    It could be me (I am definitely not a technical whiz!!)

    Did anyone have this problem at first? If you could help, it would be appreciated. Thanks

  14. tina says:

    Happy 5th birthday and congrats. Thank you so much for everything you have done. You have saved my life and sanity and helped me grown and change – bless you.

    I have downloaded the book and spent the afternoon working on it. I have identified a number of beliefs I didn’t know I had that I now see have been wrecking havoc on my life:

    -If he loves me they should want to change
    -love shouldn’t go away
    -every relationship is “the one” and should be worked on
    -other people make me happy or unhappy
    -I am responsible for fixing or changing him

    Scary stuff. I had no idea those thoughts were lurking in the background but they explain so much. Transforming them is easy, learning to believe something new is challenging but hopefully will pay off.

    Thank you for your wisdom and guidance.

  15. Joni says:

    Thank you, Natalie. I can’t tell you how helpful your website has been to me. It has been one of the major pillars of support that has helped me overcome a devastating relationship. Thanks to you I’m on my feet again. Thank you, bless you.

  16. Claire says:

    Happy 5th Birthday! xx

  17. judy says:

    Thank you Natalie. Lots of hard work and I appreciate the work and gift. Thank you so much and many returns to you.

  18. Leah says:

    Happy 5th Birthday Baggage Reclaim and a personal thank you to Natalie for talking damn good sense into me and changing my outlook. You’re an amazing woman NML!

  19. dawn says:

    Thank you Natalie for giving us ladies a place to share our stories and thoughts. Thank you for all your helpful and insightful information. It’s been wonderful to see how women have been able to apply all the things that they have learned here and find the courage and support they need to take responsiblity for and get control of their lives in more positive ways.

  20. KLM says:

    You provide great clarity in a world of meaningless, soul-destroying crap.
    Thank you for sharing with us; mere words cannot convey the helpfulness you have given. Congratulations for 5 years and let’s hope for at least 25 more.

  21. no_more says:

    HAPPY 5th BIRTHDAY Baggage Reclaim! I found this website about a year ago. I was in so much pain and thought I was the “only” one. I think that’s what kept me in that relationship so long. I had nothing to compare it to and kept trying, even though nothing I did made a difference. Of course, I couldn’t see that. I was living in illusion. I didn’t know anything about EUM or AC and finally I had information that made sense of everything I was going through. Reading the experiences of others and the invaluable resources here, have changed my life. Knowing that you are not alone is rather empowering. Like most, I wish I would’ve found this place sooner and maybe saved myself more heartache. When I started NC it was very hard, but I gained clarity from it and it does get easier. I still have moments when I think about him….but I’ve been out of my relationship for quite awhile and I couldn’t have done it without your great advice and support. Thank you NML, from the bottom of my heart.

  22. Stephanie says:

    Happy Birthday, Baggage Reclaim! And many, many more!

  23. Eve says:

    Happy 5 years NML.

    Honestly think I would have gone nuts without BM and all the reading and advice from the ladies (and gents) here.

  24. Claire says:

    Thanks Natalie!
    It’s spooky how your post come when I need them the most, or I am ready to read them.
    Is anyone having problems opening the files?

    • NML says:

      I will email you. There has been the occasional issue with files opening which is normally to do with whatever program is being used. They are PDFs

  25. susiejay says:

    Thanks Natalie – you are a star!!

    Until i found your site i had never heard of an AC or EUM, all that i did know that the man i had been dating for 3 years until July (2010) was certainly one i had never come across before. I could never understand how he put me on a pedestal, treated me like a princess and then WHAM he started to be cruel and sadistic to me, say nasty comments, pick arguments with me, treat me with disrespect in public – you name it and he started doing it which totally confused me. When he finally just walked away from our relationship one day literally without saying he had, and then when i contacted him said he wanted me to be a friend instead of a lover i was totally shellshocked. But i realise now this man was afraid of his feelings for me and he could not take it emotionally. I did also finally find out he had been cheating on me for half of our relationship but i never had a clue, there were no signs i could pick up on. Looking back now i can see all the signs of an EUM he let me get so close and then backed off again. Now i dont want anything to do with him but i am still in the grieving stage for what could have been if that makes sense to anyone.

    You Natalie and your fantastic site have given me hope for any future relationships i may have, although i will not rush into any right now – its far too new and painful to contemplate.

    Happy 5th Birthday and heres to many, many more birthdays!!

  26. Happy birth day, Baggage!

    I found your website very qualitative and informative, keep it up!

My Book - Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl

Stop believing that you did something to make them unavailable or that their inadequacies are down to your inadequacies - it is not about you; they are unavailable!

My Book - Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl

Stop believing that you did something to make them unavailable or that their inadequacies are down to your inadequacies - it is not about you; they are unavailable!
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