Welcome to another episode of The Baggage Reclaim Sessions.

In episode 73, I cover:

Personal anniversaries: January 31st marks 16 years of living in London and 9 years of self-employment. I reflect on the significance of these big changes and the importance of recognising these milestones so that we can acknowledge how much we’ve changed and the progress that we’ve made.

Tackling your conflict and criticism habits: I share 3 key areas where you can make strides in adapting your responses: distinguishing between the past and the present, getting out of a child role, and depersonalising the other person’s behaviour.

Topics include:

  • Why ‘threes’ is a big theme in why we get triggered in conflict situations, e.g. piggy in the middle, feeling ganged up upon, competing
  • Why messaging about conflict such as, ‘[Family name] don’t fight’ or ‘[Family name] don’t let people get away with stuff’ can play a big part in our reactions
  • Why we might be fighting someone else’s old and unnecessary battle
  • The value of stepping back and acknowledging what’s behind a person’s responses

Link mentioned: Episode where I talked about, What’s your money story?

Valentine’s Day: Before we give ourselves too hard a time about what we think everyone else is doing, let’s consider the bigger picture of whether this day speaks for our values about love.

Listener Question: Is it a red flag that he’s not asking me any questions [about me]?

What I Learned This Week: We’ve got to be OK with someone having a negative opinion of us, rather than burning up energy trying to change their mind.

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Listener questions can be emailed to podcast AT baggagereclaim DOT com and if there’s a topic you’d love me to talk about, let me know!

Nat xxx

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