Comments on: Guest Post: Raising Our Standards http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/raising-our-standards/ Self Esteem|Dating|Relationships|Emotional Unavailability|Commitment| Sat, 11 Feb 2012 12:13:14 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: The Dicks Before Chicks Phenomenon » The guide to single living, dating, relationships and of course, man taming. http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/raising-our-standards/comment-page-1/#comment-2519 The Dicks Before Chicks Phenomenon » The guide to single living, dating, relationships and of course, man taming. Mon, 21 Aug 2006 10:51:35 +0000 http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/raising-our-standards/#comment-2519 [...] Raising Our Standards [...] [...] Raising Our Standards [...]

]]> By: NML http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/raising-our-standards/comment-page-1/#comment-2515 NML Mon, 21 Aug 2006 09:34:08 +0000 http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/raising-our-standards/#comment-2515 Badgerbob, you really do make me laugh! Classic comment! As women we wonder why we have so much drama and it's because we perpetuate the very things that we hate so much. We do have a responsibility in these situations - it's much easier to point the finger at someone else and absolve ourselves of responsibility, but the person who really needs to change is US. We only have control over ourselves. Badgerbob, you really do make me laugh! Classic comment!
As women we wonder why we have so much drama and it’s because we perpetuate the very things that we hate so much. We do have a responsibility in these situations – it’s much easier to point the finger at someone else and absolve ourselves of responsibility, but the person who really needs to change is US. We only have control over ourselves.

]]> By: M http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/raising-our-standards/comment-page-1/#comment-2413 M Wed, 16 Aug 2006 23:25:12 +0000 http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/raising-our-standards/#comment-2413 i agree that the person who helps another person cheat is just as wrong... i agree that the person who helps another person cheat is just as wrong…

]]> By: JC http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/raising-our-standards/comment-page-1/#comment-2406 JC Wed, 16 Aug 2006 17:51:43 +0000 http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/raising-our-standards/#comment-2406 Great article. I married a guy who was married before me and cheated on his wife. I was young and dumb and thought he wouldn't do it to me. Turned out, he had NUMEROUS affairs in our 8 year marriage. He had a complete double life that I was totally unaware of. Needless to say, I divorced him and never looked back. Lesson learned. Oh and the women that get involved with married men... I have ZERO empathy for you. Great article. I married a guy who was married before me and cheated on his wife. I was young and dumb and thought he wouldn’t do it to me. Turned out, he had NUMEROUS affairs in our 8 year marriage. He had a complete double life that I was totally unaware of. Needless to say, I divorced him and never looked back. Lesson learned. Oh and the women that get involved with married men… I have ZERO empathy for you.

]]> By: badgerbob http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/raising-our-standards/comment-page-1/#comment-2405 badgerbob Wed, 16 Aug 2006 14:08:45 +0000 http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/raising-our-standards/#comment-2405 You two guys must be gay. Where is your sense of adventure? "An honest, respectful, and happy date"??? WTF!! Do both of you guys still live at home? Discipline in a relationship, is better than attraction and lust?? I am going to throw up. I would love to follow you guys on a date, with a camera. It would make a great sleep aid. You two guys must be gay. Where is your sense of adventure? “An honest, respectful, and happy date”??? WTF!!
Do both of you guys still live at home?
Discipline in a relationship, is better than attraction and lust?? I am going to throw up.
I would love to follow you guys on a date, with a camera. It would make a great sleep aid.

]]> By: Brad K. http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/raising-our-standards/comment-page-1/#comment-2396 Brad K. Wed, 16 Aug 2006 04:20:22 +0000 http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/raising-our-standards/#comment-2396 Disrespect in the young has to be trained out of the individual. This is called 'socialization', or acquiring social values. Disrespect that is allowed to continue will always get worse, until someone gets hurt. Or more people get hurt. If women and men refused to date people that behaved despicably, at least fewer people would be hurt. There used to be laws against interfering with a married couple. Aren't we all so much better off with that not being enforced? Fletcher asks what we can do? I think we start by choosing our friends and dating partners by their parenting skills first. Attraction, lust, glib stories just don't add long-term stability to a relationship like discipline (will to complete a task), integrity, life skills, and kindness to animals and children. Respect and a happy nature help a lot, too. The next thing to do is to teach our kids that dating is about picking a co-parent. Not fun, not entertainment, not social status. Making babies. Visualize the skills and values your husband/wife should have in 25 years -- and look for that before going on a date. Have more group evenings out, other social occasions instead of bad dates. An honest, respectful, and happy date may not be as 'exciting' or make other kids jealous, but will be more fun for more years. Disrespect in the young has to be trained out of the individual. This is called ‘socialization’, or acquiring social values. Disrespect that is allowed to continue will always get worse, until someone gets hurt. Or more people get hurt.

If women and men refused to date people that behaved despicably, at least fewer people would be hurt. There used to be laws against interfering with a married couple. Aren’t we all so much better off with that not being enforced?

Fletcher asks what we can do? I think we start by choosing our friends and dating partners by their parenting skills first. Attraction, lust, glib stories just don’t add long-term stability to a relationship like discipline (will to complete a task), integrity, life skills, and kindness to animals and children. Respect and a happy nature help a lot, too. The next thing to do is to teach our kids that dating is about picking a co-parent. Not fun, not entertainment, not social status. Making babies. Visualize the skills and values your husband/wife should have in 25 years — and look for that before going on a date. Have more group evenings out, other social occasions instead of bad dates.

An honest, respectful, and happy date may not be as ‘exciting’ or make other kids jealous, but will be more fun for more years.

]]> By: Fletcher http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/raising-our-standards/comment-page-1/#comment-2384 Fletcher Tue, 15 Aug 2006 17:33:44 +0000 http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/raising-our-standards/#comment-2384 Rock on! But, how can this cycle be broken (on a larger scale, I realize that it boils down to the action of the idividual!) Keep up the awesome work. Rock on! But, how can this cycle be broken (on a larger scale, I realize that it boils down to the action of the idividual!) Keep up the awesome work.

]]>