Comments on: Recognising Things About Yourself In the Man You Profess to Love – Part 1

By: Leonine

Leonine — Wed, 22 Jul 2009 20:13:30 +0000

I will be reading the links and connections to this post for a while to come yet – but on this bit alone I have to say it’s opened my eyes yet a little wider.

I begin to see that, yeah, I might well be picking EUs and ACs to avoid facing up to…(haven’t got that quite figured yet) but perhaps responsibility, loss of freedom, avoidance of role play stuff, limitations… a load of things I think I might fear happening because of a relationship, that I didn’t either “know about” or acknowledge to myself before now.

Yet, right now, I can hear my darling mother echoing from my childhood…”If I was young today, I wouldn’t get married: I’d travel the world… it’s never been better for women before now”; “A man brings you down. That’s it! You’re life’s finished…”

Yikes. And she has been married to my father for over 55 years.

Maybe, just maybe, I HAVE been drawing EUs and ACs to ensure I won’t get suckered in…

…which brings me to needing to investigate why I then did get suckered in by the ninnies, and why I was so ready to stay despite the unhappiness.

Lol, what a kaleidoscopic mess to have to pull from. I’d better get reading!

Best Regards, Leonine

By: Gaynor

Gaynor — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 21:44:23 +0000

I was with the King of “Flip Flappers!”

So much indecision and endless EXCUSES!! It exhausts me just to think about it.

By: Gail

Gail — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 21:13:04 +0000

Hi Marjie,

I have been in your same place, but many years and times over. After my last one, which I am now at week one of NCR and after a lot of soul searching, plus reading Natalie’s book (highly recommended) and reading the posts on here, I came to a realization that the answers were within myself to change. To work on changing the perception of myself, what drew me to these men and last but not least, I just couldn’t live like this anymore, one assclown to another and believe me they don’t change. I didn’t get this way overnight and it will take a lot of work. I have just started working with Natalie directly as I am determined to get off of this merry-go-round and one that has not been all that merry! I hope this helps and stick to it….Gail

By: Marjie

Marjie — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 18:20:20 +0000

Hmmm….this is right on track with me. I am indecisive, and that must’ve contributed to my failed relationships and why men pull a disappearing act on me after a few good dates. I do like this post, for it tells me things dead on of what my issues are. What’s lacking, however, is the suggestion on how to break away from it. Through this, I do recognize my problems and determined to change them for a successful relationship in the future. But it would also be nice to read something that would guide me to my progress.

Any thoughts?