Sexy, Savvy, and Satisfied
January 23, 2007 by NML
Okay, so I realise that there are not a lot of articles about careers on this site, which makes perfect sense. I mean how many of us really want to discuss our possibly pathetic and unhappy jobs when we can talk about men and their innumerable issues, sex, and other totally satisfying and increasingly interesting topics? But, I’m assuming that the majority – if not all of us - are working women. Right? You probably have some sort of job. I don’t know – maybe you’re a cat sitter or something. My point is – why don’t we talk about it more often?
Obviously we all have those wonderful bills to pay, and need money for that fabulous addition to our wardrobe. But really – do we love what we do? Or are we just passing time working at dead-end depressing jobs?
I’m constantly asking people that question. I don’t know - Chalk it up to my search for meaning in a confused world. Whatever. It’s the reaction that gets me. Almost every single time, I get a hesitation – followed by a smile and an “It’s okay” or some other variation of the same theme. Every time!
My theory? We’re terrified. Bottom line. We constantly moan and groan about our present positions. But – having that job security keeps us from taking any action. Clearly, nobody wants to be on the streets or dependent on family or friends. God forbid. We are sexy, savvy, intelligent working women with a good head on our shoulders. We know what we want.
Or so we fool ourselves into believing. The completely ironic thing? A lot of us have no clue what we’re doing. And if we do, we’re not happy doing it. I mean, come on ladies. We don’t even know what we want in a man, much less a job or career.
It’s so easy to get stuck. You make money, pay your bills, survive. And the cycle continues. Then you look back at the last couple or more years of your life and feel like you totally wasted your time. So what wonderful words of advice am I trying to give? Just this – re-evaluate what makes you happy.
What do you love sooooo much that you would be content doing every day for the rest of your life? Basically, what are you passionate about? Can you even imagine waking up and wanting to go to work???
It’s time to grab the bull by the horns! Life is too short to waste it on something we hate. Especially if you’re single, relatively unattached, and have little responsibilities other than paying rent and bills on time. If you don’t take it now – when will you?
Alright, so maybe I’m not the best person to talk about this. Last year I had four different jobs, and lived in four different places alone. Hey, what can I say? I refuse to do something I completely abhor. Go ahead. Call me unstable. But guess what? I have absolutely no regrets…. For me, living is all about learning, growing, taking risks, and enjoying the ride.
This post was contributed by Randomly Sane and you can visit her blog, Clouds Over Blue.
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I am stuck in a job I abhor and am of the same mindset in that if you hate something, change it…In the past, this has actually led to me getting up and moving abroad to work, with child in tow…However, there comes a point in life, when sometimes, you are governed by circumstances..Take my present situation, I really get no satisfaction from my job and would do anything to change it, but I live in a small area of the world where jobs are hard to come by, I scan newspapers, jobcentres ect, but there is absolutely nothing to choose from. I thought about going back to college to retrain, the courses I was interested in, are hours away, as those are the closest colleges that do them. I cant move, my daughter is at a key age in her schooling, so my plan…to wait two more years until she is done, and can start in sixth form college elsewhere. The prospect of remaining for another two years in something I hate drives me crazy, as does being here four days a week, I cant leave, I need the money, which is pretty good for this area, I have a mortgage and bills to pay…So what can I do???? Try to keep that pint glass half full and keep looking for that opportunity that might just fall in my lap.
Harsh, harsh, I feel you are being too harsh.
It may look like you just need to overcome circumstances to move, change men, dump the crappy job when it makes sense for your happiness. But what about your inner drives — loyalty, integrity, commitment?
When the company hires you, there is always at least one officer or supervisor to take your hand and say ‘Welcome’. Isn’t it rude to leave? Won’t politeness keep you there until the company at least displays rudeness worse than walking out?
And doesn’t this apply, too, to dating?
I am afraid that if I get better at walking away at the right time, I might never return from rude behavior. How is *that* for inertia?
Maybe we can learn to use an ‘I have overstayed my visit’ rule at work, instead of ‘Be polite’.
Enjoy!
Brad K.
Caroline – I think you are doing the right thing. You clearly have searched and looked for opportunities to move on, but you also have some serious responsibilities. The point I’m really trying to get across is that being stagnant and unhappy – and not doing anything about it is wrong. I have many friends who constantly complain, but are not really searching for anything better. You, on the other hand, have done all you can, and now just have to wait – but you haven’t given up your dreams! Which is extremely admirable given your circumstances.
And Brad – it’s because of my inner drives that I choose not to settle – loyalty, integrity, and commitment to myself. To being true to who I am. I realize that the tone may have come across flippantly, but I’m not talking about randomly changing jobs or men when I don’t “feel” happy one day. I’m talking about knowing deep down that this is not where you want to be in life. Change never comes easy, and sometimes we have to defer our goals – but let’s be honest with ourselves and make plans to move on.
For example, I have a friend who has been teaching high school for the past two years, quit last August and moved to Nashville to work at Starbucks and write songs. I was surprised, but happy for her. After all, it may not work out, but at least she tried. Of course, a lot of people can’t do something quite like that because of circumstances, but I find it inspiring.
Being depressed at a job just because they were “nice enough” to hire you isn’t worth it. Plus, what type of vibe are you giving off to your co-workers if you’re miserable?
My perspective? - Keep trying until you find your niche!
There’s my friden’s stroy. Everyone think it’s difficult to understand but reasonable. I don’t want be to in her shoes though.
Work. We all have to do it.
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