What drives a Drama Seekers need for attention and Relationship Crack?
April 1, 2008 by NML · 5 Comments
Yesterday in my first post in the 30 Days of Drama Reduction series, the theme of attention came up repeatedly.
The type of woman that finds herself knee deep in drama all the time is seeking attention. Like a celebrity, for her, attention is attention and when the relationship is at it’s most dramatic, for that period of time she will feel like the centre of his universe and the focal point of his attention, regardless of whether it is positive or negative. This is your Relationship Crack.
If you are a Drama Seeker, accidental or otherwise, you’ve come to crave the type of attention that can only be derived from unhealthy relationships.
So how did you get here?
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Mr Unavailable and The Fallback Girl Book One Available to Buy
February 21, 2008 by NML · 9 Comments
Just over two and a half years ago I stumbled across the realisation that not only did I love Mr Unavailable’s (emotionally unavailable men) but that I was a commitment-phobe that was sabotaging all of my relationships, unbeknowst to me. I started sharing my insights here and at The Mr Unavailable Guide, and I am still astounded by the number of women that are just like me.
Mr Unavailable and The Fallback Girl Part One is finally available to purchase. It’s my guide to emotionally unavailable men and the women that love them. I am empowering women to get smart about their faux relationships with these men and gain real positive change so that they can find personal happiness, which in turn, will lead to better relationship opportunities. This is not about trying to change him (most of us have realised that it’s nigh on impossible) and instead find out how and why Mr Unavailable behaves as he does so that you know how to read the signs and get the hell out. This is the start of embarking on path of building your self esteem so that you can get happy and open yourself up to the prospect of a healthy relationship.
Find out the types of situations that you can be drawn into by these men, get a list of his many signs of emotional unavailability, learn about how he manages down your expectations with The Status Quo through blowing hot and cold and how these men pull the whole ‘This one time in bandcamp’ thing where they trot out the same lame excuses so that we feel sympathetic to their ‘plight’ and don’t ask for too much. Discover how Mr Unavailable relegates you to ‘accidental’ booty calls or friends with benefits and why the relationship with this man is doomed. This is just the beginning…
It is £5 which is roughly $9.83 although it will tell you when you go through to checkout!
Please let me know if there are any problems downloading. This is the first time I have ever done an ebook so no doubt there will be a technical glitch or something! I will be doing a website and if there are any amendments that are made, you will automatically be sent a revised edition.
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Mr Unavailable and The Fallback Girl Part One Launching and Competition
February 19, 2008 by NML · 8 Comments
on this post
It gives me great pleasure to announce that this Thursday I will be launching my first ever ebook! It’s now available to buy!I know that it has taken much longer than I anticipated but I have taken the decision to publish the book as an ebook trilogy in order to stop the wait! Thank you to all of you have been patient and the hundreds who registered by email!
What is it about? Mr Unavailable and The Fallback Girl is my guide to emotionally unavailable men and the women that love them. I am empowering women to get smart about their faux relationships with these men and gain real positive change so that they can find personal happiness, which in turn, will lead to better relationship opportunities.
Book One focuses on helping you understand who Mr Unavailable is, how he operates, what makes him tick, the types of situations you can find yourself in with him, why he is dangerous, and most importantly, how to spot and avoid him. It also gives an initial background to the Fallback Girl, emotional unavailability in general, and commitment-phobia.
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Is women loving jerks and Bad Boys really a dating myth?
February 11, 2008 by NML · 31 Comments
I’ve been reading a couple of thought provoking posts over at one of my favourite blogs 40s Singleness, in particular a post about women loving jerks being a dating myth, and of course it’s got me thinking.
Women do love jerks, i.e. the perpetual ‘Bad Boy’. Or if we put it in a language that makes us a bit more comfortable: we love men that create drama. We want excitement, passion, fireworks, and whilst we sometimes get that, we often get plenty of mistreating, emotional unavailability, and ambiguity. ‘Nice Guys’ aren’t claiming a rough ride for no reason; it’s because they often get relegated into the friend zone for behaving half way decent and being available.
Very few women would hold their hands up and say they like assclown Bad Boys and those that do, well they’re a different, rather honest kettle of fish, but every day women blindly pursue relationships with men that reflect the negative things that they believe about themselves, love, and relationships.
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Advice: Where did I go wrong? The trap of the emotionally unavailable, inconsistent woman
December 6, 2007 by NML · 9 Comments
Craig asks: I am 37-year-old single male who decided to try Internet dating as thought it would be a great way to actually meet someone based not entirely on physical attraction. I’d only been on the site for a month when I made contact with a woman who had been unhappily married for twenty years and it had ended two years ago. We initially sent each other a couple of emails before exchanging mobile numbers.
Our first conversation lasted two hours and one of her stipulations was that she did not send text messages nor ask men out. I was comfortable with that. We talked a few more times on the phone with each chat lasting about an hour. In these chats we shared so much, which ranged from meaningful to light-hearted etc. I didn’ t phone her for three days and I received a text message where the general gist was “You are in my thoughts” and “I thought you would have phoned me”. I replied saying that I cared about her etc and would call that night, which I did and we had another long chat where she asked when we were going to meet up. I agreed to meet her on the Sunday - This was no blind date as both our photos were posted on the dating site.
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