Comments on: The Drama Reduction 12 Step Programme

By: NML

NML — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 20:36:07 +0000

LisaQ – Glad you love it. I think we need 12 steps for a few things but this was a good place to start.
Cheekie – It is so frustrating to consider yourself helpless and the fact of the matter is that we aren’t; it’s just easier to be resigned to a situation or cater to the drama. It always passes – amen! As LisaQ says – Don’t engage!
FinallyOverIt – Hopefully you have read the post I did about managing drama in the workplace! It’s todays post (29th april)
Kim – Glad you love it – You are sounding much different in the comments – I am pleased!
Karen – Wow! What a story and I am so glad that you see things for what they really are and know that you are blessed with a son. It’s true that we think we won’t get over them and then we surprise ourselves when we do. At the time we’re very focused on the present feeling. He sounds like a spineless jackass and kudos to you for dealing with the situation so well.

By: Karen

Karen — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:47:18 +0000

Finally over it,
I work with an ex EUM. We dated on and off for a few years. I was out with him one night and he told me he was going to Egypt in a few days to visit his family for a week. When he came back to work the news spreak quickly through the office that he had gotten engaged. He had gone to Egypt so his family could arrange a marriage for him. He never said a word to me about it. I was devastated. I felt like such a fool. I went out that weekend to drown my sorrow’s and hooked up with an ex. Well, I got pregnant. Now I am a single mom of a 3 year old. I still work with the ex EUM. He is married now with 2 kids. We are civil to eachother, but we really don’t talk anymore. The point is, I didn’t think I would ever get over him and I had to see him everyday, but as we both moved on with our lives it got easier. He became less and less important to me as I started to focus on other things. Now I see it was all for the best anyway. I would never have had my son if he didn’t go to Egypt. It is harder to get over someone when you see them everyday, but it is not impossible. Your feelings will fade.

By: Kim

Kim — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:43:58 +0000

LOVED this too! Great post NML! My fav is #10. Anything worth having takes work but you can’t do it alone. BOTH parties have to be working at it.

FinallyOver It – I can’t imagine seeing my EUM daily. It is hard enough to heal without them around. Maybe NML has some suggestions.

By: FinallyOverIt

FinallyOverIt — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 15:21:06 +0000

This is great, I really need this right now. I am trying to get my EUM out of my life, and we work together, and I’m having a really hard time because he is in my face every day! What do I do? How can I do the NC when I am forced to have contact? It’s getting to me today. I got stuck having to ride the train into work with him this morning, and it was agony. I’m miserable, and just want him to go away…..

By: cheekie

cheekie — Sun, 27 Apr 2008 21:14:03 +0000

my fave:

2. We are in charge of ourselves and our relationships. Drama can be as big or as little as we want it to be. The choice to engage is our choice alone.

no truer words were ever said. it’s up to us. it’s our choice what we ALLOW into our lives. and on those days when you feel the emotions to be sullen and melodramatic, well, you may not have made that choice, but you do make the choice in how you react and act on it.
we ALL have days where we feel weak, vulnerably, lonely and yes, even sad to be alone.

However, you don’t have to act on it just because you feel it. It will pass, it always does.

By: lisaq

lisaq — Sat, 26 Apr 2008 21:17:13 +0000

I love this! I’ve often thought of creating the same thing, but have never taken the time to actually do it! Bravo!