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Vixen’s Guide to: Impressing Your Man when You Don’t Know How to Cook

April 26, 2006 by Vixen 

woman slicing up vegetablesIn this day and age, it’s getting easier and easier to actually go through life not knowing how to cook. Our mothers were installed in the kitchen at an early age and can whip up meals that leave our senses reeling and have the magic touch with every dish in the kitchen.
Cooking is an essential tradition passed down from mothers to daughters since the dawn of time. It’s actually a rite of passage in some cultures that the females should know how to cook before they reach maturity.

It’s easy enough to get a man, however it’s been proven time and time again that keeping him is the problem. There is even the adage that says, “The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach,” and other sayings that tell us what we already know. Men love to eat!

However the question remains, how do you cater to your man’s appetite when you don’t know how to cook? Not everyone is fortunate enough to have Mother Dearest showing us the ropes in the kitchen. Some haven’t been taught or some taught very badly. Some girls have been tomboys all their lives and cooking was never something they were interested in. Some of us, even though we have the best intentions turn out to be utterly abysmal in the kitchen!

The basics of cooking are simple: Utensils, Heat and Ingredients, however it’s the mixing of these that causes the problem. Here are some tips to help you sassy divas manage to whip something up once in a while.
1. Get over your fear of the kitchen: Sure it’s a dusty room in your house that is rarely used except for your morning staples but that doesn’t mean that it should intimidate you. Decorate it with colourful towels, shiny appliances and nifty tools to make your cooking a pleasure.
2. Be your own guinea pig: Yeah, as much as your guy loves you, I don’t think he’s going to want to try your green eggs and ham after you just tried poisoning him with some toxic broccoli the night before. Try out your cooking on yourself first–does it taste good? Need less salt? Need more garlic? You have to be your own tester until you are more confident in your skills.
3. Learn how to cook the staples: Rice, pasta and potatoes are the staples that turn out to be key basics to every diet. Sure, they are all carbs but easy enough to cook. Get a rice cooker, follow the directions EXACTLY on the back of that pasta box or microwave those potatoes for 2 minutes each (after washing and piercing the skin) for a perfect baked potato. These are the staples to every meal and can be added with other options for a savoury dish.
4. Know how to cook 1-2 meals–Perfectly: I’m sure that you have your favourite dish that you can make with your eyes closed. It could be whipping up a cheese omelette, throwing together a healthy salad or some fried chicken, whatever it is, excel in it. Let this be your fall back dish, something that you know that you will never go wrong in.
5. Take Lessons: If you have extra money/time you can invest in a cooking class at the local university, a friend, your mom, some community classes at the YMCA or even a bonafide Cordon Bleu course. This might give you the added confidence you need in the kitchen and some more ideas to work with.
6. Shop for easy to cook, pre-packaged meals: Nowadays they make all kinds of dishes that are already pre-done found at your local grocery store. They have everything from pre-cooked meats, casseroles and pot pies. Sure it’s not original and authentic, but it’s edible and easy. Follow the directions on the back of the box exactly and you will get the desired results. If any catastrophic happens you can sue the company and make a load of moolah that you can use to hire your own cook. Either way, it’s a win/win scenario.
7. Get Recipes: The best way to enlarge your prowess in the kitchen is to cook, cook, cook. So look for recipes for different dishes on the Internet, try them out and then when you have it just right, serve it to your man.
8. Set the Mood: You might just be serving up a chicken/pasta dinner, but with the right ambiance, he will feel like he’s dining like a king. Plus, every woman glows under candlelight so feel free to turn up the Luther Vandross, turn down the lights and break out your ’special’ china/lingerie.
9. Back up Plans: If your meal doesn’t turn out like you planned, you might have to trash it or feed it to Fido before he comes. Make sure you have the number of the deliveryman ready just in case.
10. Don’t Knock Your Cooking: It’s all in the presentation. If you present the meal to him like it’s the best dish on the face of the earth, he has no choice but to try it and enjoy it. He knows that he can’t criticise you for trying and will in fact just appreciate the gesture rather than laugh at you.

A guys needs are simple, and good food ranks right on top of the list. So let’s start catering more to our men.Vixen is the Deputy Editor for Baggage Reclaim. Visit her blog, the Bad Girls Guide.

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