In the final 2022 episode of The Baggage Reclaim Sessions, I share a deleted chapter from my forthcoming book, The Joy of Saying No: A Simple Plan to Stop People Pleasing, Reclaim Boundaries, and Say Yes to the Life You Want. Originally titled Gone Girl, Tiger Woods,...
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Why We Don’t Leave Painful and Sucky Situations: It’s Due to People Pleasing
Something many of us find baffling is painful, sucky, one-sided relationships that, despite resenting our mistreatment by the other party, we find it challenging to create healthier boundaries and distance and/or cut ties. It's all too easy to judge ourselves for...
People Pleasing is Like Creating Debt and Then Expecting Others to Pay It Off
When your decision to remain in an unhealthy or unfulfilling relationship or situation is about 'investment' and attempting to recoup a loss, you wind up making the person/people indebted to you. There becomes a sense of entitlement. This is when you have a very...
People Pleasing and the Fear of ‘Inconveniencing’ Others
Something I'm very aware of is that I have an in-built discomfort about 'inconveniencing' others. Thanks to being a recovering people pleaser and it being as natural to me as breathing because it started in early childhood, my longstanding habit was to put others...
Podcast Ep. 194: The Self-Sabotage of Overgiving, Over-Responsibility, People Pleasing, Perfectionism and Overthinking
Self-sabotage is consciously and unconsciously being and doing things (or not) that stop us from reaching our goals, meeting our needs or being happy. In this week’s episode of The Baggage Reclaim Sessions, I talk about why overgiving, being...
People Pleasing & Breaking Up With Dignity Are Mutually Exclusive
One of the biggest barriers to making the decision to break up, staying broken up, or breaking up with your self-esteem in tow, is people pleasing in an attempt to influence and control the other person’s feelings and behaviour. In this situation, you think that...
The People Pleasing Diet
SICK OF BEING MISTAKEN FOR A DOORMAT & READY TO MAKE A CHANGE? You're not alone in being a people pleaser but it doesn't have to continue. If you've ever felt powerless, marginalised, invalidated, unrewarded, underappreciated, unheard, suppressed, taken...
There Really Is No Pleasing Unpleasable People, and That’s Okay
Something I've come to fundamentally understand in adulthood is there's no pleasing some people. And it's not because you didn't try hard enough or that there's something wrong with you--some people don't want to be pleased. Unpleasable people don't want the good...
The People-Pleasing Diet: Why You’ve Got to Give Up Trying to Please the Unpleasables
It's painful when the realisation hits you that when it comes to a certain someone or even certain people in your life, nothing, and I do literally mean nothing, is ever enough. You could walk over hot coals, limbo under a bar held 5cm off the ground with spikes on...