The Blame Trap Only Ends Up Helping Shady People

When we’re in unhealthy and unfulfilling relationships, we often blame others, and then ourselves, for the other person’s behaviour. For instance, we claim that our romantic partner ex(es) ‘obviously’ didn’t love them right or give the right support or sex them...
Podcast Ep. 270: Unhealthy Relationships and Knowing When To Fold

Podcast Ep. 270: Unhealthy Relationships and Knowing When To Fold

In this week’s episode of The Baggage Reclaim Sessions, I talk about unhealthy and unhealthy relationships and knowing when to fold even though we might feel very invested. What stops us from stepping away? How does focusing on good points and good times create...

Airing our dirty laundry? Or being more open about gaslighting and mistreatment?

For over seventeen years, I’ve written about relationships and seen a hell of a lot of stuff online. It’s always fascinated me how men can talk about their painful breakups and receive empathy, sympathy and new romantic prospects. Their DMs fill up, fast. Empathy for...

Being naive about ‘authority figures’ is a blind spot we need to clear up

Sometimes we can be wilfully and even dangerously naive about people we perceive to be authority figures. We decide, for instance, that because of someone’s profession, they always do the right thing. It’s this mistaken belief that authorities always have...

Don’t Explain Someone’s Disrespectful Behaviour to Them

Something I’ve seen many people do, and to be fair, I used to do it myself, is explain disrespectful and even abusive behaviour to the perpetrator. Here’s the craic though: What makes us think that someone doesn’t know that what they’re doing...