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Podcast Ep. 223: The Gaslighting of Future Faking

by NATALIE | Apr 30, 2021 | Podcast: The Baggage Reclaim Sessions

If you’ve ever experienced self-doubt, confusion, disappointment and a sense of rejection after someone said or did things that intimated or outright promised a future that didn’t materialise, you’ve experienced Future Faking. In this week’s episode...

Podcast Ep. 214: We Don’t Need To Put So Much Bandwidth Into Keeping Up Appearances

by NATALIE | Feb 26, 2021 | Podcast: The Baggage Reclaim Sessions

In this week’s episode of The Baggage Reclaim Sessions, I talk about why keeping up appearances as a way of life can be so damaging and why we’ve got to connect with who we really are and want to be so that we stop reinforcing negative stories and outdated...
Podcast Ep. 93: Am I Lying To Myself?

Podcast Ep. 93: Am I Lying To Myself?

by NATALIE | Aug 25, 2017 | Podcast: The Baggage Reclaim Sessions

Greetings from Amsterdam where I’m having some lovely family time. This week’s episode of The Baggage Reclaim Sessions tackles the issue of knowing when we’re lying to ourselves. We’re all guilty on BS-ing ourselves from time to time but when...

Advice Wednesday: How Do I Begin To Make Sense of Being Catfished?

by NATALIE | Dec 14, 2016 | Letting Go

Jan asks: I met “Ryan, 35” on Tinder and we hit it off right away.  Within a few dates, I asked why a guy like him (handsome, smart and funny) would be online and he admitted that his wife had died of ovarian cancer two years before. I took his baggage into...
Advice Wednesday: Have I Misunderstood My Ex’s Unavailability?

Advice Wednesday: Have I Misunderstood My Ex’s Unavailability?

by NATALIE | Jul 13, 2016 | Emotional Unavailability

Elizabeth asks: I was in a fantasy and codependent relationship where I kept trying to extract empathy and commitment from a Mr Unavailable. It’s been five months since we split, and three since No Contact. Recently he contacted me but lazily and passive. I responded...
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natlue

Until you know what you’re closed to, so what ...

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Until you know what you’re closed to, so what doesn’t work for you, what’s not in alignment with your values, boundaries, needs, desires and expectations, you can’t know and enjoy what you’re open to. You’re not a free-for-all. Express your boundaries by expressing more of who you really are. #baggagereclaim #healthyboundaries #boundariesarebeautiful #recoveringpeoplepleaser #peoplepleaser #selfcare #healthyrelationships #codependentnomore

natlue

Trying to live up to everyone’s expectations is ...

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Trying to live up to everyone’s expectations is like trying to cup the ocean in your hands. And yet so many of us do this to ourselves and then wonder why we feel so lost, anxious, low and resentful. Making ourselves jump through hoops for other people’s shoulds takes a toll on our emotional, mental, physical and spiritual well-being as well as the health and of our intimate relationships. When we allow ourselves to create healthy boundaries, to be more honest versions of ourselves, we accept that disappointing others by not always being able to meet their shoulds is a natural and healthy part of life. #baggagereclaim #healthyboundaries #selfcaretips #listentoyourself #recoveringpeoplepleaser #peoplepleaser #recoveringperfectionist

natlue

It’s easy to look at certain things we be and do...

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It’s easy to look at certain things we be and do and put it down to us not being good or worthy enough. The truth is, though, we only accept too little, put up with too much, expect too much of ourselves or others, or fear being our real selves, because of our emotional baggage. That’s the old stories, feelings and judgements we carry about our experiences, not the truth of who we are. So the next time you see yourself accepting crumbs and sub-par relationships and situations, remember that it’s about what you’ve been through, not an indictment of who you are as a person. #baggagereclaim #peoplepleasing #recoveringpeoplepleaser #healthyboundaries #emotionalbaggage

natlue

This time sixteen years ago, I was waiting outside...

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This time sixteen years ago, I was waiting outside the WH Smith at Victoria Station to go on our first date. Thanks to Southern Rail, Em was late. 😆 A few weeks earlier, we’d caught eyes at a board games night. I wondered who the cute guy in the Freddy Kreuger-style jumper was 🤣 in between playing a gangsta game of Monopoly. In typical fashion, I made a wisecrack right at the end of the night, which led to our mutual friend introducing us. On our way home, my friend got a text from him asking who her “cute friend” was and for my number. Within minutes of our first date, we were bantering, and sixteen years on, we’re still having the craic and making each other belly laugh. My biggest supporter, who hasn’t ever for a second questioned what I do, even when I told him on our second date that I “write a blog thing, but don’t go reading it behind my back!” (and he didn’t), he’s believed in me even when I’ve doubted myself and encouraged me to keep going. And he still remains my favourite person on the planet… even though we can’t agree on the thermostat 🤣🤣🤣 Cheers to us @emmonlemmy
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