Baggage Reclaim with Natalie Lue
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Maybe we don’t need to assume that our relationship has lost its spark

by NATALIE | May 16, 2022 | Healthier Relationships

After being with our partner for a long time or getting caught up in the daily grind, it’s not unusual to feel as if the relationship is a bit tired. Feeling pulled in a million different directions by competing demands, as well as ageing, changing bodies, and...

Questioning our complicated ideas about ‘love’ is the loving thing to do

by NATALIE | Feb 14, 2022 | Healthier Relationships

To love someone involves meeting them where they’re at without losing yourself. Love is loving, caring for, trusting and respecting all of the person not just focusing on the good points. You let go of hidden agendas about what you want to ‘get’ from them (or avoid)....

Podcast Ep. 249: The Trouble With Bare-Minimum Relationships

by NATALIE | Feb 4, 2022 | Podcast: The Baggage Reclaim Sessions

In this week’s episode of The Baggage Reclaim Sessions, I revisit the topic of accepting crumbs in our relationships. What does it mean when someone’s doing the bare minimum? Why, if they could do so much in the beginning of the relationship, are they...

Being together 24/7 or sharing all the same interests won’t make a happy relationship

by NATALIE | Oct 20, 2021 | Healthier Relationships

Our assumptions about what makes for a happy relationship are a source of unnecessary tension and frustration in our relationships. It’s this idea that ‘soulmates’ (or certainly people who ‘really love each other’) want to spend every spare moment together. We...

The “give and take” of relationships needs more intimacy and boundaries

by NATALIE | Sep 21, 2021 | Healthier Relationships

Growing up, I often heard the advice “Relationships are about give and take”. Years on, and after hearing thousands of stories, I’ve realised that we’ve taken this too literally. It’s as if we think that one person exists to give and the...
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natlue

Until you know what you’re closed to, so what ...

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Until you know what you’re closed to, so what doesn’t work for you, what’s not in alignment with your values, boundaries, needs, desires and expectations, you can’t know and enjoy what you’re open to. You’re not a free-for-all. Express your boundaries by expressing more of who you really are. #baggagereclaim #healthyboundaries #boundariesarebeautiful #recoveringpeoplepleaser #peoplepleaser #selfcare #healthyrelationships #codependentnomore

natlue

Trying to live up to everyone’s expectations is ...

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Trying to live up to everyone’s expectations is like trying to cup the ocean in your hands. And yet so many of us do this to ourselves and then wonder why we feel so lost, anxious, low and resentful. Making ourselves jump through hoops for other people’s shoulds takes a toll on our emotional, mental, physical and spiritual well-being as well as the health and of our intimate relationships. When we allow ourselves to create healthy boundaries, to be more honest versions of ourselves, we accept that disappointing others by not always being able to meet their shoulds is a natural and healthy part of life. #baggagereclaim #healthyboundaries #selfcaretips #listentoyourself #recoveringpeoplepleaser #peoplepleaser #recoveringperfectionist

natlue

It’s easy to look at certain things we be and do...

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It’s easy to look at certain things we be and do and put it down to us not being good or worthy enough. The truth is, though, we only accept too little, put up with too much, expect too much of ourselves or others, or fear being our real selves, because of our emotional baggage. That’s the old stories, feelings and judgements we carry about our experiences, not the truth of who we are. So the next time you see yourself accepting crumbs and sub-par relationships and situations, remember that it’s about what you’ve been through, not an indictment of who you are as a person. #baggagereclaim #peoplepleasing #recoveringpeoplepleaser #healthyboundaries #emotionalbaggage

natlue

This time sixteen years ago, I was waiting outside...

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This time sixteen years ago, I was waiting outside the WH Smith at Victoria Station to go on our first date. Thanks to Southern Rail, Em was late. 😆 A few weeks earlier, we’d caught eyes at a board games night. I wondered who the cute guy in the Freddy Kreuger-style jumper was 🤣 in between playing a gangsta game of Monopoly. In typical fashion, I made a wisecrack right at the end of the night, which led to our mutual friend introducing us. On our way home, my friend got a text from him asking who her “cute friend” was and for my number. Within minutes of our first date, we were bantering, and sixteen years on, we’re still having the craic and making each other belly laugh. My biggest supporter, who hasn’t ever for a second questioned what I do, even when I told him on our second date that I “write a blog thing, but don’t go reading it behind my back!” (and he didn’t), he’s believed in me even when I’ve doubted myself and encouraged me to keep going. And he still remains my favourite person on the planet… even though we can’t agree on the thermostat 🤣🤣🤣 Cheers to us @emmonlemmy
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