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Podcast Ep. 132: Fear of sacrifice, loss and being trapped

Podcast Ep. 132: Fear of sacrifice, loss and being trapped

by NATALIE | Mar 22, 2019 | Podcast: The Baggage Reclaim Sessions

While talking about dating and relationship anxiety in episode 130, I touched on fear of sacrifice, loss and being trapped. In this week’s episode of The Baggage Reclaim Sessions, I explain why part of our struggle to be, do and have the things that we want,...
Advice Wednesday: Why Do I Have A Pattern of Valuing People Who Don’t Value Me?

Advice Wednesday: Why Do I Have A Pattern of Valuing People Who Don’t Value Me?

by NATALIE | Dec 28, 2016 | Happiness & Self-Esteem

Bob asks: I have this pattern where people I hold as important to me do not find me all that important.  The best man at my wedding would never have dreamed of me as worthy of being more than a guest at his wedding.  My friends who I would have liked to have asked to...
Have You Already Made Up Your Mind About Dating & Your Future Prospects?

Have You Already Made Up Your Mind About Dating & Your Future Prospects?

by NATALIE | Oct 18, 2016 | Dating

“There’s no decent men left to date.” “Women only want flashy guys with lots of money who mess them around.” “Dating websites/apps are full of shallow/shady people and people don’t go out anymore.” “Men in their...

Advice Wednesday #4: My Ex Exacerbated My Insecurities By Objectifying Other Women–How Do I Move On?

by NATALIE | Feb 17, 2016 | Letting Go

The tricky situation: In my last relationship, the problem of emotional cheating was a really big insecurity of mine.  After reading your blog and starting a Feelings Diary, I came to understand why I was insecure about it and it boiled down to me not being happy in...
Getting Out of Your Uncomfortable Comfort Zone: Why it’s time to stop using your time to reinforce unhealthy beliefs

Getting Out of Your Uncomfortable Comfort Zone: Why it’s time to stop using your time to reinforce unhealthy beliefs

by NATALIE | May 21, 2014 | Patterns & Habits

While reading a few reader stories of pain mixed in with good points, I was struck by the thought, Do these people realise that everything about their relationships is about reinforcing and even justifying an unhealthy course of behaviour and thinking? I’m all...
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natlue

Until you know what you’re closed to, so what ...

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Until you know what you’re closed to, so what doesn’t work for you, what’s not in alignment with your values, boundaries, needs, desires and expectations, you can’t know and enjoy what you’re open to. You’re not a free-for-all. Express your boundaries by expressing more of who you really are. #baggagereclaim #healthyboundaries #boundariesarebeautiful #recoveringpeoplepleaser #peoplepleaser #selfcare #healthyrelationships #codependentnomore

natlue

Trying to live up to everyone’s expectations is ...

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Trying to live up to everyone’s expectations is like trying to cup the ocean in your hands. And yet so many of us do this to ourselves and then wonder why we feel so lost, anxious, low and resentful. Making ourselves jump through hoops for other people’s shoulds takes a toll on our emotional, mental, physical and spiritual well-being as well as the health and of our intimate relationships. When we allow ourselves to create healthy boundaries, to be more honest versions of ourselves, we accept that disappointing others by not always being able to meet their shoulds is a natural and healthy part of life. #baggagereclaim #healthyboundaries #selfcaretips #listentoyourself #recoveringpeoplepleaser #peoplepleaser #recoveringperfectionist

natlue

It’s easy to look at certain things we be and do...

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It’s easy to look at certain things we be and do and put it down to us not being good or worthy enough. The truth is, though, we only accept too little, put up with too much, expect too much of ourselves or others, or fear being our real selves, because of our emotional baggage. That’s the old stories, feelings and judgements we carry about our experiences, not the truth of who we are. So the next time you see yourself accepting crumbs and sub-par relationships and situations, remember that it’s about what you’ve been through, not an indictment of who you are as a person. #baggagereclaim #peoplepleasing #recoveringpeoplepleaser #healthyboundaries #emotionalbaggage

natlue

This time sixteen years ago, I was waiting outside...

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This time sixteen years ago, I was waiting outside the WH Smith at Victoria Station to go on our first date. Thanks to Southern Rail, Em was late. 😆 A few weeks earlier, we’d caught eyes at a board games night. I wondered who the cute guy in the Freddy Kreuger-style jumper was 🤣 in between playing a gangsta game of Monopoly. In typical fashion, I made a wisecrack right at the end of the night, which led to our mutual friend introducing us. On our way home, my friend got a text from him asking who her “cute friend” was and for my number. Within minutes of our first date, we were bantering, and sixteen years on, we’re still having the craic and making each other belly laugh. My biggest supporter, who hasn’t ever for a second questioned what I do, even when I told him on our second date that I “write a blog thing, but don’t go reading it behind my back!” (and he didn’t), he’s believed in me even when I’ve doubted myself and encouraged me to keep going. And he still remains my favourite person on the planet… even though we can’t agree on the thermostat 🤣🤣🤣 Cheers to us @emmonlemmy
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