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Why you’re catching feelings when it’s supposed to be ‘just’ casual sex

Why you’re catching feelings when it’s supposed to be ‘just’ casual sex

by NATALIE | Jul 21, 2021 | Healthier Relationships

Sometimes we want to have sex, but, understandably, we might not want to wait until we’re in a relationship for that to happen. In theory, we should be able to sleep with someone without it needing to be complicated by getting to know them too much (or at all),...

Podcast Ep. 206: Let’s Wait Awhile

by NATALIE | Nov 26, 2020 | Podcast: The Baggage Reclaim Sessions

This week’s episode of The Baggage Reclaim Sessions is about waiting to have sex. When I said that I would do a series of episodes on sex in episode 202, by far the most requested topic was about abstaining. From waiting to have sex until, for example, a few months...

More On Sexual Values: Questions To Ask Yourself Before Embarking On Sex

by NATALIE | Jun 26, 2010 | Values & Compatibility

Over the past few days I’ve been talking about sexual values to help you avoid sexual pitfalls, such as having sexual insanity by repeating the same actions but expecting different results, and trying to teach old dogs new tricks. Recently I wrote about...
Getting To Grips With Sexual Values – Stop Trying To Revolutionise The Wheel, Chasing The Feeling + more

Getting To Grips With Sexual Values – Stop Trying To Revolutionise The Wheel, Chasing The Feeling + more

by NATALIE | Jun 25, 2010 | Values & Compatibility

Following on from part one yesterday and my previous post on sexual pitfalls, here are more of my thoughts on sexual values…. 6. Stop trying to teach old dogs new tricks. Trust me, you haven’t got time to revolutionise the wheel. No matter which way you...
Getting To Grips With Sexual Values – Avoiding Sexual Insanity, Rewarding and Gratitude and more

Getting To Grips With Sexual Values – Avoiding Sexual Insanity, Rewarding and Gratitude and more

by NATALIE | Jun 24, 2010 | Values & Compatibility

Reading the comments on my post yesterday about sexual pitfalls was a startling reminder of how as women, while we can often devalue ourselves inadvertently through our actions, that some of the men we’re involved with are only too eager to devalue us also, even...
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Until you know what you’re closed to, so what ...

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Until you know what you’re closed to, so what doesn’t work for you, what’s not in alignment with your values, boundaries, needs, desires and expectations, you can’t know and enjoy what you’re open to. You’re not a free-for-all. Express your boundaries by expressing more of who you really are. #baggagereclaim #healthyboundaries #boundariesarebeautiful #recoveringpeoplepleaser #peoplepleaser #selfcare #healthyrelationships #codependentnomore

natlue

Trying to live up to everyone’s expectations is ...

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Trying to live up to everyone’s expectations is like trying to cup the ocean in your hands. And yet so many of us do this to ourselves and then wonder why we feel so lost, anxious, low and resentful. Making ourselves jump through hoops for other people’s shoulds takes a toll on our emotional, mental, physical and spiritual well-being as well as the health and of our intimate relationships. When we allow ourselves to create healthy boundaries, to be more honest versions of ourselves, we accept that disappointing others by not always being able to meet their shoulds is a natural and healthy part of life. #baggagereclaim #healthyboundaries #selfcaretips #listentoyourself #recoveringpeoplepleaser #peoplepleaser #recoveringperfectionist

natlue

It’s easy to look at certain things we be and do...

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It’s easy to look at certain things we be and do and put it down to us not being good or worthy enough. The truth is, though, we only accept too little, put up with too much, expect too much of ourselves or others, or fear being our real selves, because of our emotional baggage. That’s the old stories, feelings and judgements we carry about our experiences, not the truth of who we are. So the next time you see yourself accepting crumbs and sub-par relationships and situations, remember that it’s about what you’ve been through, not an indictment of who you are as a person. #baggagereclaim #peoplepleasing #recoveringpeoplepleaser #healthyboundaries #emotionalbaggage

natlue

This time sixteen years ago, I was waiting outside...

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This time sixteen years ago, I was waiting outside the WH Smith at Victoria Station to go on our first date. Thanks to Southern Rail, Em was late. 😆 A few weeks earlier, we’d caught eyes at a board games night. I wondered who the cute guy in the Freddy Kreuger-style jumper was 🤣 in between playing a gangsta game of Monopoly. In typical fashion, I made a wisecrack right at the end of the night, which led to our mutual friend introducing us. On our way home, my friend got a text from him asking who her “cute friend” was and for my number. Within minutes of our first date, we were bantering, and sixteen years on, we’re still having the craic and making each other belly laugh. My biggest supporter, who hasn’t ever for a second questioned what I do, even when I told him on our second date that I “write a blog thing, but don’t go reading it behind my back!” (and he didn’t), he’s believed in me even when I’ve doubted myself and encouraged me to keep going. And he still remains my favourite person on the planet… even though we can’t agree on the thermostat 🤣🤣🤣 Cheers to us @emmonlemmy
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