The Blame Trap Only Ends Up Helping Shady People

When we’re in unhealthy and unfulfilling relationships, we often blame others, and then ourselves, for the other person’s behaviour. For instance, we claim that our romantic partner ex(es) ‘obviously’ didn’t love them right or give the right support or sex them...

Podcast Ep. 251: Spotting a Romance Scammer

Watching and listening to a host of shows on romance scams revealed a similar pattern throughout. In this week’s episode of The Baggage Reclaim Sessions, I share my observations about scams and scammers. From distinguishing questionable and shady behaviour...

Questioning our complicated ideas about ‘love’ is the loving thing to do

To love someone involves meeting them where they’re at without losing yourself. Love is loving, caring for, trusting and respecting all of the person not just focusing on the good points. You let go of hidden agendas about what you want to ‘get’ from them (or avoid)....

Airing our dirty laundry? Or being more open about gaslighting and mistreatment?

For over seventeen years, I’ve written about relationships and seen a hell of a lot of stuff online. It’s always fascinated me how men can talk about their painful breakups and receive empathy, sympathy and new romantic prospects. Their DMs fill up, fast. Empathy for...

Podcast Ep. 235: Delusions of Inferiority

This week’s episode of The Baggage Reclaim Sessions is about inverted narcissism. This is where we make everything about us, only it’s that we have an overinflated sense of our inferiority. Narcissists and the narcissistically-inclined, on the other hand,...