It's not your fault if you've struggled to find love using the lessons and tactics learned earlier in life. We've all internalised some pretty confusing and downright messed-up ideas about dating, love, and relationships. It's time to change this.


Transform your dating life and relationships with this powerful series of classes and live Zoom Q&A sessions designed to help you cultivate a deeper sense of self-confidence and create the mutually fulfilling, loving connections you deserve.

Are you tired of feeling anxious and unsure in your dating life and relationships?

Do you find yourself repeating the same patterns and falling into the same traps?


(and, yes, you can speed it up – just click the cog icon)

This transformative series of classes is designed to help anxious, confused and disillusioned daters and relationship strugglers cultivate a deeper sense of self-confidence and create fulfilling, healthy, loving relationships by sharing fundamentals and frameworks that most of us wish we’d learned before embarking on romantic relationships.
The way we’ve been taught to date, ‘market’ ourselves to be attractive, and forge and hold on to relationships doesn’t work and causes a great deal of pain and confusion. Many of us have chased ‘types’ that are a mish-mash of outdated tropes and biases and aspects of our parents and caregivers.

We’ve learned to ignore the fundamental requirement of genuine compatibility and meeting our emotional needs while being ourselves.

Dating apps, like much of what we learned about dating and relationships, reinforce superficiality and people pleasing. It’s no wonder we wake up feeling hungry in our relationships, are confused by the disparity between who we’re attracted to and the lack of or painful relationship, or we flail around on dating apps getting messed about and disappointed. Next thing, we feel anxious, disillusioned, or numb. It’s time to get back to basics and learn the fundamentals of dating and relationships.


  • Embrace Self-Assurance: Navigate the dating scene with newfound confidence, armed with a clear understanding of your identity and desires.
  • Cultivate Deeper Connections: Approach relationships with confidence and intimacy, equipped with insights into compatibility and mutual fulfillment.
  • Discernment in Action: Recognise when to invest effort and when it’s time to gracefully step away from situations that don’t align with your needs.
  • Optimise Your Energy: Cease investing time and emotions into fruitless relationships, reclaiming your focus and self-worth.
  • Navigate Relationship Challenges: Identify and address personal stumbling blocks to avoid repeating familiar pitfalls in relationships.
  • Foster Self-Reliance: Build a foundation of self-trust to alleviate feelings of anxiety, frustration, and disillusionment in dating and relationships.

Experience transformative sessions tailored to specific areas, each aimed at inducing profound shifts in your mindset and actions within romantic contexts. Gain invaluable frameworks and tools to foster self-awareness, self-assurance, and self-trust, empowering you to make choices aligned with your authentic self and your individual needs.


Available now - Readying for Love: Crucial Concepts for Creating and Sustaining Mutually Fulfilling, Loving Relationships

Focus: the vital ingredients of loving relationships

Imagine attempting to bake a cake without its core ingredients? Well, that’s what so many of us attempt to do with dating and progressing into a relationship. We have criteria, lists and ‘types’ that ignore or deprioritise what we truly need, desire and deserve. As a result, we often find ourselves in unfulfilling or even unhealthy relationships. In this illuminating class, I break down what it takes to create, forge and sustain mutually fulfilling relationships so that no matter what draws you to somebody, you don’t get sidetracked from building loving, caring, trusting and respectful relationships. PURCHASE THIS CLASS

Available now - Are They the Right One for You?: The Compatibility Factor

Focus: understanding compatibility

Over almost twenty years of guiding people about dating and relationships, I’ve seen many thousands of people grappling with the same problem: repeatedly walking into the same traps of common interests, ‘type’, and chemistry. If you’re tired of finding yourself in unfulfilling and unhealthy relationships or feel like you keep falling for the same person, this class is for you. If you feel confused or in pain by your great-on-paper partner, help is at hand. I’m going to break down compatibility, including core values and the importance of meeting your needs, so you can recognise who’s right and know when to walk away. PURCHASE THIS CLASS

Available now - Overcoming Dating Anxiety: Navigating the Early Stages with Confidence and Authenticity

Focus: starting out on the right footing

Are you tired of feeling anxious and uncertain in the early stages of dating? Do you find yourself caught in a frustrating cycle of moving too fast, people pleasing, freezing and stalling, or sacrificing your authenticity out of fear of scaring someone away or starting over? Let’s help you shift your dating mindset so you approach new relationships with confidence and intention. You’ll gain insight into the critical factors behind your dating struggles. Through a powerful framework, you’ll learn how to navigate the early stages of dating with authenticity, vulnerability, and self-trust. Discover what you need to know to proceed and when the right time is to ask critical questions. If you’re ready to break free from the cycle of anxious dating and cultivate meaningful, sustainable connections, this class is for you. PURCHASE THIS CLASS

Available now - Could This Be It? Recognising Loving Partners and Healthy Relationships

Focus: identifying healthy love and relationships

Do you struggle to distinguish between healthy, loving relationships and unfulfilling or even toxic partnerships? Gain the tools and knowledge you need to see your relationships clearly and make empowered choices in love. We’ll dive deep into the four essential qualities of loving partners and explore the key landmarks of healthy, thriving relationships. We’ll also address recognising warning signs you need to address something and/or incompatibility. Whether you’re currently dating or in a relationship, this class will help you gain the clarity and confidence you need to cultivate the loving, supportive partnership you deserve. PURCHASE THIS CLASS

August 6th - Know Where You Stand: Intimacy and the 5 Stages of Relationships

Focus: building and sustaining intimacy

A huge source of anxiety, confusion and boundary issues is not knowing ‘what goes where’ in dating and relationships. As a result, you may have expectations that don’t match the stage of your relationship. You might also lack the emotional availability and boundaries needed to foster the intimacy levels that sustain and grow your relationship, leaving you feeling unfulfilled. By understanding the natural progression of intimacy and the markers of each relationship stage, you’ll be empowered to communicate your needs more effectively, show up from a place of genuinely wanting your relationship to be intimate, and navigate your connections with clarity and confidence. PURCHASE THIS CLASS

September 3rd - Co-piloting Your Relationship: Embracing Healthy Boundaries

Focus: embracing healthy boundaries to help you and your relationship thrive

We co-create our relationships with our partners and co-piloting the relationship instead of one being the driver and the other the passenger is fundamental – and that takes boundaries. Key to healthy, fulfilling relationships, many of us find creating, honouring and maintaining boundaries challenging or even impossible. Learn the boundary basics, gain the skills and confidence to be yourself, communicate your needs, say no and express limits when necessary, and navigate conflict with grace and resilience. PURCHASE THIS CLASS


Each month, I release a new pre-recorded class (you can watch and/or listen to the audio version). Classes will be 60-75 minutes. The pre-recorded format means you can watch the class at your own pace at a time that suits you while also not worrying about missing out on the opportunity to ask questions.

I will host a live Q&A each month two weeks after each class. You have the opportunity to submit questions up to two weeks before and after the class, ensuring enough time for ample support and clarification. For example: The pre-recorded class of Readying for Love becomes available April 9th 2024. The live Q&A will be April 23rd 2024.

You will receive access details for the Q&A in advance of the session.

Don’t worry if you can’t make it to a live Q&A session – a replay of each Q&A will be accessible to all participants, and, of course, you can submit your question in advance.

This first set of six sessions are aimed at people who are single, dating, in the early stages of a relationship, or have awareness of a painful or frustrating dating or relationship pattern that they’re ready to crack. I will be running these sessions each month (excluding December).

Don’t miss this opportunity to invest in yourself and your relationships. Join the Relationship Fundamentals series today and take the first step towards a more confident, fulfilling love life!

Classes are US$100 each, or save 25% when you sign up for all six classes (US$450).


Natalie Lue standing in her studio with her books in the background wearing a Farm Rio jumper, red lipstick, and with her hair in two braids

I’m writer of one of the longest-running self-help, dating and relationship blogs in the world, Baggage Reclaim, and author of five books including Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl, The No Contact Rule, and The Joy of Saying No (Harper Horizon). I’ve spent two decades helping people who struggle with emotional unavailability, shady relationships, and settling for crumbs to break the cycle so that they reclaim themselves and experience more love, care, trust, and respect. I’ve been featured and quoted in The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Guardian, The Observer, BBC, ITV’s Lorraine, NPR, and many more.

Most of us did not grow up learning about our needs, wants, feelings, values, boundaries, and self-care. Throw in that we might not have observed healthy templates for relationships, plus we were conditioned into the likes of people pleasing, and it makes total sense that we’ve woken up in adulthood not knowing ourselves and making painful dating and relationship choices that leave us feeling perplexed and wounded.

When we’re in these patterns, it’s not unusual to feel that we’re “not good enough” and to doubt our worthiness for a loving relationship. This only makes it easier to accept crumbs from people who reflect our fears and negative beliefs, creating a vicious cycle that erodes our faith and confidence in ourselves and the possibility of being in a mutually fulfilling relationship while also liking ourselves.

Often, people are looking for a blueprint, magic formula, or even a relationship-in-a-box because they don’t know what to do, what they need or want, or what to look for. They’re scared of getting things wrong and trusting themselves.

I’ve spent twenty years exploring and studying relationships via my blog, podcast, books, courses, and client work while on my journey of healing childhood and relationship trauma. During this time, I’ve also enjoyed an 18-year+ mutually fulfilling, intimate, loving relationship. I have frameworks, practices, and tools to help you navigate dating and relationships from a place of deeper confidence, where you know what you’re looking for, why, where you’re at, and where you’re headed. You’re allowed to have needs; you’re allowed to want to be in a relationship; and the loving relationship you desire is possible


Do I attend the class live?

Each class is pre-recorded and made available on the advertised date by 6 pm UK time (7 pm CET, 1 pm EST, 10 am PDT – check your time zone). You can, however, attend Q&As live.

What is the format of classes?

The class will be in a video format with captions and will also have an audio version available. If you purchase the series of six classes, the audio will version of each class will also be accessible via a private podcast feed which you can then listen to on your preferred player. e.g. Apple Podcasts, Spotify.

Can I ask questions?

Yes. Each month, I host a live Q&A that’s also available on replay if you can’t make it live. You can submit your question in advance or during the session. Each Q&A session will be around 60 minutes. 

Can you help me with my dating/relationship issue during the Q&A?

Yes! The Q&A is to answer questions related to the classes and also to help troubleshoot and resolve issues participants are wrestling with. However, given that it’s a Q&A, it won’t be individual coaching sessions for each participant! If you want more in-depth guidance on personal matters, you can book consultation sessions with me.

How do I access my class(es)?

I host all of my classes at 24-48 hours before the class goes live, you will receive login info. You will also be notified when the pre-recorded class is available to watch. If you’ve purchased all six classes in this first series, it will be the same access details for each one. If you’ve taken another of my courses within the last three years, your login details for Relationship Fundamentals will be the same. I host all of my classes and courses here. You will still receive an email about access info before the class goes live.

I can’t afford the class/series but really want to do it. How do I apply for a bursary or scholarship?

If you are unable to pay due to financial hardship, please email natalie AT (replace AT with @)

Choose the applicable subject line: ‘scholarship’ (unable to pay) or ‘bursary’ (able to pay some money).

You don’t need to go into the ins and outs; I appreciate you might be going through difficulties and it’s hard when you feel as if you’ve got to lay yourself out. Just a brief note about needing to apply and which class(es) will more than suffice. You will receive a reply within 2-3 working days.


How do I know which class is best for me?

Each class description in the schedule lists the core topic and the main themes the class speaks to. If you want to get an overview of how to co-create and sustain healthy, intimate, loving relationships, the first class, Readying for Love, is a great place to start. Otherwise, pick the area(s) you want to troubleshoot. Not sure? Drop me an email at natalie AT

Do I need to buy the entire series or I can I just buy the classes I need?

Classes are available individually for US$100 or as the series of six for US$450. I’ve designed the classes to be great standalone as well as within the series. You don’t need to have watched previous or all of the classes to benefit from one. Obviously, if you feel as if dating and relationships have been a bit of a bust for you, the entire series is the ideal one to go for. Remember, each class targets a specific area of dating and relationships. Check the schedule and see which ones resonate. If there’s one that makes you want to avoid the topic, that’s probably the one you need the most!

I still have Reclaimer Membership. Does it include Relationship Fundamentals?

Yes, it does. Log in to your membership, and you will see it in your dashboard.