About

baggage reclaim natalie lueBack in September 2005, I launched Baggage Reclaim as a tongue-in-cheek guide created to discuss the complexities of being a woman, the choices that they make and the dodgy men that add to their load. Bored of reading headlines like ‘X ways to seduce your man’ and stuff about trapping/catching men that aren’t looking to be caught, I wanted to bring something different to the table.

Every day, I help thousands of people identify problems, articulate them, and put them in charge of taking action to solve them.

I write about a lot of the complex issues that affect modern relationships in a no-holds barred way. I’m firm and real, but I’m also that friend that will tell you the truth. I write the advice that I wish I’d been given or had access to, when I had low self-esteem and a penchant for dating the same guy in a different package. The blog originally started out being predominantly aimed at women but a lot’s changed since then and this blog is aimed at anyone who wants to improve their emotional and relationship literacy.

My advice is relevant to everyone who has found themselves in a cycle of pain and a bad relationship pattern or who ultimately wants to get thought-provoking insight into living and loving with their self-esteem in tow.

Modern relationships are tricky, with many people unknowingly engaging in and doing counterproductive things and the emergence of technology like text messaging, instant messenger, emails, and online dating, have completely screwed with people’s expectations of what constitutes ‘normal’ and ‘decent’.

Baggage Reclaim is a shared journey in understanding what you can do to have better relationships and a better sense of self. I empower people to put boundaries in their lives, to opt out of painful situations that detract from them, and to have better relationships. Ultimately I help people to find healthier ways to be happier and to use their time here on earth living their lives authentically instead of trying to be somebody who they’re not and taking up a vocation in people-pleasing. Over 500K readers a month from around the world read my posts and thousands have read my ebooks/books Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl and The No Contact Rule.

If you want to get in touch, use the contact page.

More about me, Natalie/NML

I’ve been blogging since June 2004 when I started sharing my thoughts on being ‘tired of men‘. An ad exec at the time, I was also in love (or so I thought) with a guy who had a girlfriend. My dating woes, antics with my crackerjack family, and the exploration of what the hell was going on in my head, fast gathered a following. When I broke up with a guy from a five month barely there relationship and declared myself into Mr Unavailables, it opened up the floodgates. Since then, I’ve received thousands of emails from women (and men) around the world.

I started this blog as a late twenty-something with poor taste in men and relationships. I thought I was having a run of bad luck and the issue was ‘them’ and it was, but it was also me. At the time I was struggling with a debilitating disease and a poor prognosis, but as I started to take care of myself, build my self-esteem, and inject boundaries into my life, my life and health changed dramatically for the better and there are thousands of people who became part of my journey, which is still ongoing. The next phase in my life saw me (unexpectedly) meet the boyf, followed by a baby, followed by another one and we live in leafy Surrey in the UK and got married on June 9th 2012. Since early 2008, I gave up my job to write full-time.

I’ve guested on Sky News on a number of occasions as well as The Chrissy B Show, HuffPost Live, and The Vanessa Show, as well as guesting on BBC Radio periodically (normally to give my advice on being the other woman!), have been in Red Magazine (UK), Marie Claire, Now Magazine, Look Magazine and some national newspapers including the Daily Express and News of the World (Fabulous Magazine) as well as the old London paper The London Lite which regularly featured columns from my personal blog, plus have appeared in newspapers further afield like the Toronto Globe and Mail.  I was the guest blogger at Haymarket’s PR & The Media 2010 Conference, spoke at Cybermummy 2010 and 2011 on making money from your blog, and have also contributed to various blogs including Bitchbuzz, Ask Dan & Jennifer, Dollymix, In The Powder Room and Cosmopolitan online. Aside from writing Baggage Reclaim, I’m also the founder of Bambino Goodies where I coolhunt cool stuff for under 5′s and their discerning parents plus I’ve delivered blogging workshops and consulted for various clients on working with brands and growing online. A script is currently in development for Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl and I’m working on a pilot for my own TV show.

When I have a spare moment, I love to read – before kids, I read at least a book a week. Since early 2014, I’ve got back into reading almost every day and love disappearing into my own little world or having my imagination sparked – I normally end up scribbling notes in one of many notebooks. I’ve rekindled my love of drawing – Paper on the iPad is fantastic – and I also like to sew, make stuff, a little baking, and travel whenever possible.

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One Response to About

  1. Mukesh says:

    It’s great to come across sites like yours that look at dating from a new perspective. Kudos.

My Book - Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl

Stop believing that you did something to make them unavailable or that their inadequacies are down to your inadequacies - it is not about you; they are unavailable!