If you've ever thought something like "It started out so great, why can't they go back to being that guy/girl?" or been like a property developer imagining what someone could become with your 'love' and your fixing/healing/helping ways, or even wondered how you...
This is an excerpt from…Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl Book Two. Yes it has been delayed a bit…more on that very soon but here is an excerpt from the chapter ‘Betting on Potential’ – one of the recurrent destructive behaviours that keep Fallback Girls rooted in dubious relationships…
“Potential is something that should be derived from the promise of actual actions that have already occurred, not the blinkered fairy tale in your head. Potential is about the potential of the relationship, NOT the potential of what the guy could be if only x, y, and z were to occur. Here is the difference:
You should see potential in a relationship that has the positive hallmarks of a relationship with direction. This normally occurs because both parties are getting to know each other, there is consistency, there is no ambiguity, there is communication of feelings, and both parties have both their feet in the relationship.
In this week’s episode of The Baggage Reclaim Sessions, I talk about unhealthy and unhealthy relationships and knowing when to fold even though we might feel very invested. What stops us from stepping away? How does focusing on good points and good times create...
Something I’ve noticed when I listen to people describing their relationships is that they talk about what the person does and often link it to what a previous partner wasn’t doing. “They text/call me regularly.” “They don’t stand me up.” “They’re not treating me like...
Some of our strongest ties to even the flimsiest of relationships are based on what we experienced or even hoped for in the beginning. When we're living in the past because the present has too many code red realities biting at us, we end up spending a great deal of...
The quality of our relationships romantic and otherwise matter. A lot of the issues that we come up against when we struggle with dating and forging healthy relationships are rooted in essentially attempting to create 'quality' relationships even though we're not...
I think it's safe to say that everyone understands what the term "being on the rebound" means and yet time after time, many of us dare to go where we've already gone before and had our fingers and hearts burned, and we inflate our emotional airbags and be the "Buffer"...
Recently I joked on Facebook about how a Mr Unavailable kept saying "It is what it is" in a conversation where he'd asked me to explain why his ex wouldn't speak to him anymore. Incidentally, I told him that I imagined that it was the secret long-distance girlfriend...
It can be pretty difficult to wrap your head around the idea that the person who you're in love with and may have spent a great deal of time around, doesn't want the relationship that you want. It puts you in a quagmire - you love them, you want to be with them, but...