The Blame Trap Only Ends Up Helping Shady People

When we’re in unhealthy and unfulfilling relationships, we often blame others, and then ourselves, for the other person’s behaviour. For instance, we claim that our romantic partner ex(es) ‘obviously’ didn’t love them right or give the right support or sex them...

The Self-Blame Habit

As children, when something ‘bad’ happened, we looked around for a reason that ‘made sense’ to explain our feelings, the whys and hows, etc. We did this to work out what we needed to be and do in the future to avoid experiencing that negative outcome again. Kids see...

Taking Things Personally: What Is It, and How Do We Stop?

Since I started writing Baggage Reclaim, I’ve become increasingly mindful of where I tend to take things personally. These instances always point back at old hurts and narratives that I need to confront in some way. Of course, I’m not alone in taking things...