Lately, I have been thanking my lucky stars that I had the guts to walk away from my now ex-husband. He was quite the piece of work in the cheating department – See my post titled ‘I Married a Serial Cheater‘. It was the best decision I could have done for myself.
A good friend of mine and his wife live in a neighbourhood that would rival most television reality shows. Every week he sends me the latest gossip via email. Sadly, one couple in particular usually makes the headlines.
Apparently, the husband has quite the problem with keeping his zipper in the up and locked position. The worst part is that she is totally aware of this. Over the years there have been numerous instances of his wife finding out about his affairs, but she continues to stay.
One time, she was in his office at work waiting for him to finish up with a business meeting. She didn’t have to dig very far as she found seductive emails from some anonymous woman on his computer. Within the same 5 minutes, she found some woman’s name written on a piece of paper that even had the bars name where they met. I guess this was in case he got his women mixed up.
My friend told me the wife was really fed up with his cheating (this time) and was finally going to leave her husband. I was overcome with joy. Finally! She was going to leave the bastard. Alas, it was not so. He begged her to stay for the umpteenth time and bought her a new car and a trip to Hawaii just to make up for it. They went to couple’s counseling and he even quit drinking just to show her he was dead serious this time.
All had been quiet on that front until last week. He had arranged a ‘business’ meeting overseas and was calling her a few days prior telling her how much he loved her and that he was a changed man. She thought this behavior was a bit off and being the paranoid wife that she is now, and forever will be; she searched his luggage before he left. She found 400 dollars worth of cash and 2 condoms in an envelope. Not a good sign.
She says if the condoms are gone when he gets back, she will leave him. Huh? For the love of fidelity, why wait until then? What more proof than that do you need? We hear stories of women putting up with mud sniffing pigs for years with evidence that is so undeniable, it becomes laughable.
I realise we all have breaking points but when is it time to say enough is enough? Are we that afraid that this is all there is? Are we so afraid of the unknown that we can’t even conceive of a life without a man in it?
I know of instances where women believe their husbands or boyfriends will change if only they were skinnier, better in bed, get a boob job etc. The reality is that these men are hardwired to cheat. It has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them. They have a problem. However, by staying with these types of men, it reinforces the message that we will tolerate their antics over and over. We can only change this by walking away and believing we are worth more and deserve more.
This post was contributed by Rose City Girl. She’s a fine food and wine loving mixed media artist that travels a lot and stays away from men that mistreat her!