The More Validation You Seek, The More Unworthy You Feel

If you’ve ever tried to convince someone about you, you will be all too familiar with that feeling of becoming unconvinced about yourself. Seeking validation is the equivalent of being and doing things that say, ‘Please, tell me who I am. Tell me I’m worth it. Tell me...

We Don’t Have to Judge Our Own or Other People’s Confidence Levels So Much

People often assume I’m extroverted and that I’m a Confident Person. They mention my public speaking, writing this blog for almost seventeen years, and my love of dancing and letting loose to 90s R&B or dance. I’m quite introverted though. I also...

Podcast Ep. 232: Columboing New or Prospective Partners on Social Media

via GIPHY When you’ve just started chatting to, dating, or going out with someone, it’s not usual in these times to do a spot of, how shall we put it, checking up on social media. OK, let’s call it snooping, columboing (I love Columbo!). You know,...

Podcast Ep. 217: Trust is a gamble, but we can learn to make good bets

Humans devote so much bandwidth into trying to dodge vulnerability, controlling the uncontrollable, and belatedly addressing boundary issues to allay their fears and insecurities. But our habits wreck our confidence, sabotage intimacy, and can inadvertently cause us...

3 reasons why playing games in relationships is a bad idea

When we have a pattern of unhealthy relationships, there’s a level of game-playing taking place. Often, this is mistaken for ‘normal’ dating and relationship behaviour when actually, it’s destabilising. Playing games is anything we do that...