How to Get Out of Something You’ve Already Agreed To

It’s tricky when we find ourselves wanting to get out of something we’ve agreed to. We don’t like letting people down and feeling like we’re “flaky” or “lazy”. Side note: we’re not.  If you need to get out...

Trying to Make Someone Change Won’t Fix the Problem of Poor Boundaries

A huge source of frustration is knowing that something doesn’t feel good or right for us but waiting for something or someone else to change. This is a boundary issue that leads to us making choices, even passive ones, and then feeling wounded by them. This renders us...

Feeling conflicted when a friend attempts to reconnect after a fallout and distancing

I’ve spoken to so many people who still wrestle with grief over the end of a friendship. As I explained in my friendship series of podcast episodes, we imagine that our friendships will last forever and take it to heart when we outgrow them or we experience a...

When our friend dates our ex, is it OK, and can we be upset about it?

Humans love to feel in control of the uncontrollable, which, incidentally, is pseudo-control. Comforting, sure, but nonetheless an illusion. Take breakups. We can feel, for all intents and purposes, ‘over’ our ex based on how we see life working out. Who...

A note on outgrowing friendships

It’s discomforting to let go of people who have been in your life for a time. We always imagine that friendships will last forever and that the trickier ones will get better. We don’t want to outgrow our friendships. Part of growth and living is letting go...