Trust begets trust. Your level of trust in others reflects the level of confidence you have in trusting yourself. Saying that no one is trustworthy or being suspicious and sceptical is just a going-round-the-houses way of saying that you don’t trust yourself. You’re not willing to take the gamble of trusting because it feels like you have too much skin in the game.
The less trust you have, ironically, the more likely you are to engage with untrustworthy people. Their lack of trustworthiness will match your distrust. You get to be ‘right’, but you also get to be unhappy and stuck in the same cycle.
You can’t receive what you don’t give, and you also can’t expect to grow your relationship with trust if you feel miserly about it, almost having to count out your pennies. If it feels like you’re white-knuckling trust, as if you’re doing the equivalent of holding the bottom of a crisp/chip packet so that the person you’re supposed to be sharing with doesn’t get too much, you’re not trusting.
Clench your fists. Now, open your palms. Notice the difference. Having an open-palm attitude to trust via increased self-trust allows you to be more relaxed and aware as opposed to tense and hypervigilant.
Trust operates on a debit and credit system. If you base trust on being willing to know and trust yourself along with recognising what’s happening or the pattern of interactions with someone, trust becomes easier.
Need help with learning to listen to and trust yourself? Check out my audio series, The Intuition Sessions and The Anxiety Sessions.
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