This week’s episode of The Baggage Reclaim Sessions is inspired by a recent story that was shared with me that really illustrates how inappropriate behaviour can creep up on us and turn into big problems if we override ourselves.
In this episode:
- I explain what code amber and code red issues are
- I share the story of how a woman who’s only been dating a man for several weeks, is now going to the gym and attending Slimming World at his [sneaky] behest to look better (read: like the women he normally dates)
- I explain why we must be discerning and have a level of stranger awareness, especially in the early stages of dating
- I talk about why we override common sense, tension, discomfort about knowing that we need to take action and more, because we don’t want to put the person in question out, or we’re afraid of looking rude etc., or we don’t want to endanger the fantasy
- I Talk about why we need to be aware of inappropriate and abusive behaviour and why the situation in the story has the hallmarks of something that’s going to be an abusive relationship
- Explain why we have to be careful of people who are Choppers and why them cutting us down is about weak not strong behaviour
- Explain why, whether they’re someone you’ve known for a wet week or for some time, it’s not cool for them to try to control what you do, how you look etc–it needs to be your choice and there shouldn’t be the manipulative BS where they suggest it while telling you not to do it for them while also pushing you to do it
- Code amber and red behaviour
- The Chopper – Are you dealing with somebody who keeps trying to cut you down
- Stranger danger
- The stages of relationships
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