My brief foray into online dating had me running for the hills, but most people have a lot more patience and time than I do. My biggest problem with it is that people don’t RFTP – Read The F*cking Profile and it really winds me up. But what about when you’re trying to sift your way through the responses and decipher whether you should wink back or reply to an email? How do you decipher which ones you should be putting your energy into?
Determine your RFTP rule
It does wind me up when people fail to read the profile and send emails or winks anyway, but that doesn’t mean that we should be really rigid with our requirements, after all, we probably wouldn’t like it if a guy was that hard on us! If you have asked for someone between the ages of 28-35 and you get respondents that are 45, 50 and onwards, or 20 onwards, discard them. You can decide what your give or take is on the age bracket and you should base this on experience and what you’re comfortable with. There will be things in the profile that you aren’t willing to compromise on such as smoking, religion, interest in having kids etc, and stick to these and weed out accordingly. I would suggest that you don’t get too fussy about physical attributes as it’s all relative if you end up fancying them.
Play on Playa
People who go on about having a good time, hanging out, wanting to have as much fun as possible don’t scream ready to settle down or date seriously, even if they say that they’re looking for love, or ‘The One’. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to have fun but it’s likely that in this case fun=notch on the bedpost. What better way to reel in a woman than to make out that you’re looking for love? Also be wary of people that go on a bit too much about physical attributes because those who are genuinely looking for love, don’t place so much emphasis on the physical side.
What’s in a name?
A lot actually. If his profile contains the words ‘big’;’cock’;’sex’;’stud’;’hard’, or a sexual phrase or conatation, such as ‘Giveittomegood1969’, discard from the pile unless you’re looking for cybersex or a quick shag in the real world. Anyone who actually wants to be taken seriously, doesn’t use a profile name of this manner unless they are only after one thing.
Part of the reason that I don’t do online dating is that I don’t have the time, making me a rather poor candidate, but I know it and steer clear. People that go on and on about work or something else that takes up their time may be time poor, not great relationship material. Look out for the signs of anything that appears to suck up the time as these people will struggle to ‘adjust’ to make a relationship work.
Super-keen to hear wedding bells
Be careful of those people that are super-keen to get married and struggle to hide it from their profile. Unless you want wedding bells to ring just as quickly, this type of person needs to be discarded. People like this tend to be rather rigid with their requirements and use the word ‘must’ a lot. They don’t waste any time and make very clear what they want and what they intend. Happy days though if you’re on the look-out for a committed relationship.
No-one wants an essay, but if the person has put a well thought out profile together which isn’t littered with spelling mistakes and makes a good job of creating an image of themselves with the words, hold on to them and wink and email away to them. People like this come across as being more generous and tend not to be flashy or overly emphatic about appearance and they let the description of their lives bring out their qualities. These are good catches!
Of course I couldn’t not mention that if a guy emails you an unsolicited picture of his todger, disregard and move on. Yeuch!