It’s been six whole weeks since my last episode of The Baggage Reclaim Sessions. I wanted to touch base, give a bit of insight into where I’ve been.
In this episode, I talk about the after-effects of losing my father and share a few stories including:
That time when a relative wanted to get my number so they could call me and tell me all about myself and how after briefly feeling rather wounded, I asserted myself by making the boundaries clear, breaking a pattern and moving me forward all at once.
Why we laughed a lot on the day of the funeral, despite how painful it was, including when someone shrieked like a bird and scared the bejaysus out of everyone, especially my grandad and when the pastor told my aunt to buy a new car instead of calling up her brother (my dad) etc to come and fix it.
How we came to realise that my dad was the quintessential people pleaser and how it devastated his self-esteem and his relationships with his family, as in, the one he created and why we feel deep compassion and empathy for him when we recognise the legacy of our family’s complicated history.
Why our loss has been somewhat compounded by a certain someone not really being there for us but at the same time, why this has been liberating.
What I’ve been up to and how I’ve been doing in the midst of this grief, including how I feel like I’m bench-pressing life at times and why I’m basically grateful to grief despite how torturous it is at times.
In the episode, I mentioned that I’ve been reading, listening to podcasts and caning entire series of shows, all as part of my self-care, but I forgot to mention that I’ve also spent a lot of time outdoors, that I’ve continued to journal and I’ve basically just pottered.
My pals Jules and Debbie that I work with and that have been a wealth of support
Some of the books I’ve read while resting
Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert – Perfect for creatives who are seeking a deeper connection with their inner wisdom. This book really lit me up!
Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret by Judy Blume – For nostalgia and also because I think I might write a YA (young adult) book one day.
Grief Works by Julia Samuel – I started this a couple of days after the funeral and read more than half in one afternoon
The Seat of the Soul by Garry Zuvak – It’s a meaty read that takes some concentration but he speaks to everything I talk about on Baggage Reclaim.
Thank & Grow Rich by Pam Grout – This is actually a book about gratitude and experiencing more richness in life, so not really about money but more about looking at life differently.
She Means Business by Carrie Green – Interesting read around mindset that also includes inspiring stories.
Pivot by Jenny Blake (still reading) – My new favourite recommendation for people who are looking to make shifts in their career or business.
You Are a Badass at Making Money by Jen Sincero (still reading) – I like Jen as she’s frickin hilarious and has overcome her own money story, in her forties, which just goes to show that we shouldn’t be so quick to write ourselves off as if we’re supposed to have our lives together and ‘done’ by our thirties.
Podcasts
Live Awake (This is an a-mazing meditation-style podcast that I started listening to in the weeks before dad passed and even listened to a few hours after he was gone – thanks to pal and BR reader Jolene of Healthy Discoveries for the tip-off)
Good Life Project (thought-provoking and I enjoy getting absorbed in the stories)
Soulful PR Podcast(Janet is the business podcast I recommend to pretty much anyone I talk to about business)
Magic Lessons With Elizabeth Gilbert (I’ve still got all the archives to get through but I like her don’t give a beep attitude and her commitment to creativity)
Tara Brach (Thought-provoking series about meditation, emotional healing and spiritual awakening that always has very funny anecdotes that make the live audience giggle despite what can be serious topics)
Being Boss (One that’s gradually grown on me – it’s aimed at female business owners, typically creatives and I love that all of the interviewees have stories full of very relatable bumps). Incidentally, I listened to one of the most mind-blowing inspirational podcasts about nature and gardening of all things – I’m not exactly Miss Green Fingers – and it featured this amazing woman, Mary Reynolds. She’s doing for the plant world what I do for emotional baggage.
Big Little Lies (gripping), Chewing Gum (multiple belly-laugh inducing), Master of None (one of the cleverest shows around that captures dating and relationships so well), Dear White People (made me laugh, wince and ache in equal measure – brilliantly written and produced), How To Live Mortgage Free with Sarah Beeny (I’m fascinated by the design elements of these really desirable smaller homes that have cost a fraction of my own home), Black-ish (hilarious, surprisingly moving, grandmother is a genius mix of my mother-in-law and my mum).
Side note: I am obsessed with the Big Little Lies soundtrack.
Next stop
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Listener questions can be emailed to podcast AT baggagereclaim DOT com and if there’s a topic you’d love me to talk about, let me know!
Hey, thanks for sharing what you’ve been up to on your break. I honestly thought that you were genuinely saying goodbye to B.R. and moving onto something different. Glad you’re back, but I would’ve understood if it was time. You’ve left a wonderful legacy of your life’s journey and insights that have been helpful to a great deal of followers. I’m interested to see what else you might have up your sleeve. Peace, blessings and success on your journey.
N
on 23/05/2017 at 9:48 am
Missed you and sending you much love!
Oiza
on 23/05/2017 at 6:16 pm
I missed you Natalie. Glad you’re back.
Really enjoyed listening to this, especially the different behaviors and reactions of people around the funeral service. It almost felt like I was there.
Abdab
on 29/05/2017 at 4:53 am
I’m glad you’re back. Grief is a bugger for sure, but you can (or I did) get so much of value from it too. But it sure do take its own sweet time. It’s a peculiar journey, we all travel it eventually and yet it’s ultimately a journey we travel alone. Carrying people, sharing support and at times letting those we love carry us. I hope your journey consists of many more days when the steps forward outnumber the steps back.
Reader
on 04/06/2017 at 3:33 pm
Thanks for your blog Natalie! I hope you are doing well. I’m sure you already know this but you have been of such huge help to readers struggling and not everywhere. Take care! With everything you have been through, nothing is insurmountable.
I’ve been running Baggage Reclaim since September 2005, and I’ve spent many thousands of hours writing this labour of love. The site has been ad-free the entire time, and it costs hundreds of pounds a month to run it on my own. If what I share here has helped you and you’re in a position to do so, I would love if you could make a donation. Your support is so very much appreciated! Thank you.
Copyright Natalie Lue 2005-2025, All rights reserved. Written and express permission along with credit is needed to reproduce and distribute excerpts or entire pieces of my work.
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Hey, thanks for sharing what you’ve been up to on your break. I honestly thought that you were genuinely saying goodbye to B.R. and moving onto something different. Glad you’re back, but I would’ve understood if it was time. You’ve left a wonderful legacy of your life’s journey and insights that have been helpful to a great deal of followers. I’m interested to see what else you might have up your sleeve. Peace, blessings and success on your journey.
Missed you and sending you much love!
I missed you Natalie. Glad you’re back.
Really enjoyed listening to this, especially the different behaviors and reactions of people around the funeral service. It almost felt like I was there.
I’m glad you’re back. Grief is a bugger for sure, but you can (or I did) get so much of value from it too. But it sure do take its own sweet time. It’s a peculiar journey, we all travel it eventually and yet it’s ultimately a journey we travel alone. Carrying people, sharing support and at times letting those we love carry us. I hope your journey consists of many more days when the steps forward outnumber the steps back.
Thanks for your blog Natalie! I hope you are doing well. I’m sure you already know this but you have been of such huge help to readers struggling and not everywhere. Take care! With everything you have been through, nothing is insurmountable.