Fear plays a crucial role in alerting us to situations where self-care is necessary. Notifying you of a possible threat, it blocks love when you don’t distinguish between real and imagined threats or between past and present experiences and are unsure of what to expect from yourself from one day to the next. 

We humans treat fear as the singularly most important or existing emotion. It’s as if the others don’t count. In reality, fear is on equal footing with all other emotions. 

By consistently prioritising fear, we inadvertently build habits and responses that centre it. These habits effectively become a set of personal rules, titled ‘The Rules For [Your Name] Not Getting Hurt’, aimed at self-preservation. You’ve designed your faux rules, which always have shoulds and musts in them, to protect you from a bigger future pain. However, as you’ve based them on judging you on a past version of yourself and they prompt unproductive or unhealthy responses to fear, you are in more pain from being afraid than you are from actual outcomes. Plus, despite your efforts, the fear remains. 

Living with excessive fear is like standing on the seashore with your feet in the water but acting like you’re in the middle of the sea. Recognising this disparity is a crucial step towards reclaiming yourself and experiencing love, care, trust and respect.

Step into a new chapter of love and self-awareness with my ‘Break The Cycle’ ecourse.

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