In this week’s episode of The Baggage Reclaim Sessions, I give listeners an exclusive sneak peek by reading the first chapter from my forthcoming book The Joy of Saying No. 

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5 key topics in this episode

  • It didn’t make sense to me that I devoted so much time, energy, effort, and emotion to trying to do the right thing—being a Good Girl–and yet I felt like shit most of the time. I hated myself and my life because it felt like nothing I did was ever enough.
  • When I received the bad news about my health from my consultant, it hit me that no one was coming to save me. It was my responsibility to make decisions and take care of myself.
  • We learn early on that it’s critical to please your parents and caregivers in whatever form that takes because, well, they “know best” and we depend on them for survival and love. Plenty of us lose our sense of self and our no along the way.
  • There’s no tipping point of people pleasing where we finally win big and all our suffering and effort pay off.
  • We think we’re being “nice” and “pleasing”. Often, though, we’re angry, scared, anxious, or hoping to get something in return.

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