Why Me and Not Them?

When it appears that someone presents an entirely different persona to the outside world than what they do with you, it messes with your head when you 1) blame you for their treatment, or you 2) question whether you’re imagining what you’re experiencing,...
If they lie to themselves, why are they going to be honest with us?

If they lie to themselves, why are they going to be honest with us?

When you really take the time to get to know you, you will find that as a result of paying attention to your feelings, opinions, needs, expectations and desires, you are not only armed with a great deal of self-knowledge and self-awareness but you have so much more...
Take the focus off them and bring it back to you

Take the focus off them and bring it back to you

Our relationships romantic and otherwise, give us a window into understanding who we are and where we need to step up for ourselves. When we find that we’re experiencing the lather, rinse, repeat of the same type of person in a different package and the...
Despite ‘Good Points’, We Deal With the Consequences of People Coming as Full Packages

Despite ‘Good Points’, We Deal With the Consequences of People Coming as Full Packages

Any toxic relationship I’ve been involved in has always kept going because of my essentially cherry-picking what I wanted to remember about the person and the relationship, romantic or otherwise. While I spent most of my life feeling wounded by my father’s...
Don’t disregard early warning signs or your gut instincts as negative or judgmental – this information is useful!

Don’t disregard early warning signs or your gut instincts as negative or judgmental – this information is useful!

Due to the nature of my work and in particular my spidey senses and sniffer dog nose for shadiness and assholery, I can pick up on very subtle early warning signs that someone else may construe as me being ‘negative’ or even ‘too sensitive’. For...