Tags: boundaries and recognising discomfort, Code amber & Red behaviour & Issues, core values, discomfort, emotional needs, how to be more assertive, listening to yourself, navigating discomfort, personal bandwidth, red flags, self-care, values
When you’re out of alignment with your values and needs, the discomfort you experience is an alert. It’s letting you know something about your boundaries, what is going on, and what potentially needs to happen.
- You’re being asked to do something unworkable. For whatever reason, you don’t want to do it or are unsure about it.
- You’re being asked to do something that’s over the line. It’s an unfair and unreasonable expectation or request.
- Someone’s behaviour bothers you, and the situation doesn’t feel/look right. The issue alerts you to the need to stop, look and listen before proceeding or that you’re in danger (code amber and code red).
- You have gone off track. You’re out of alignment with your values and doing something that’s going to hurt.
- You’re not listening to, taking care of and being responsible for you. Lack of self-care and self-discipline means that you can’t meet emotional needs or honour your values. It means you are over your bandwidth, and this will take a toll on your emotional, mental, physical and spiritual wellbeing.
- You need more information before you can respond effectively. You need more time, answers, clarity or to get a reading on your feelings.
By being more mindful, you will notice when discomfort arises instead of overriding concerns and not listening to yourself. From there, you can use this intel to be more boundaried, including being more honest and assertive so that you can take care of you.
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